Blue Witch

Luxury Witch

Some things are totally priceless.

One of my favourite fantasies is to have clean, fresh-air-dried sheets, and starched and ironed pillowcases and duvet cover, every day. I'd have this indulgent luxury every day if I could afford the 'help' to do the chore.

I cannot abide changing the sheets on the bed (even though I never do it on my own, Mr BW always helps, bless him :) So, once every week or so it is.

I must have been brunged up proper, cos even when I was a student, I always changed the bed at least once every fortnight. Actually, I think we won't go there, cos, to be honest, it was probably once per week, out of necessity, but, hey, Mr BW might read this, and he might not like reading any more details ;)

I can remember staying with a friend a couple of years ago who boasted to me that he hadn't changed his bed for several months. Yes, I could tell, even had he not told me that, because the flat smelt. Nastily. And, the worse thing was, he clearly hadn't changed the spare bed for nearly as long, despite several occupants (nice mix of perfumes, male and female). IMHO, that is patently disgusting, sorry.

Blue Witch is a tart.

(Another in the occasional Piggy Bank - How to Save Loadsa Money series)

It's official, then.
Blue Witch is what is known in serious money-saving circles as a "rate tart".

Yes, I will move any of our financial business transactions anywhere where there is a better deal, better rate, or more freebies, on offer. I am fortunate in that I have time to investigate and then do these things, but I contend that I choose not to work full-time for a tyrant, so need to contribute to the GCP (Gross Coven Product) by being thrifty and economical. Although our income is probably only 60% of what it was when I worked full-time, we have a *much* better standard of living, and quality of life, now. Not least because when Witchy is stressed, the world knows ;)

In the last year, I have paid off more than £5K of our mortgage simply by offsetting savings against mortgage, using credit cards for all purchases over £3 (always paid off in full though) and paying nothing until the due date, so keeping our money in the off-set account for as long as possible.

I have made (or saved) goodness knows how much out of being aware of deals going on all sorts of things (eg buying BOGOF's and 3 for 2's in supermarkets), and by shopping round and negotiating on each and every purchase, of all kinds. Also by spotting errors in bank statements, supermarket bills etc. Probably somewhere between £1-2K in the last year, I'd guess.

In fact, I am known locally as *the* person to ask if you want to know where to get good value on anything within a 20 mile radius. BW, "Never knowingly overcharged."

So, I am always ready to pass on good sources of information. Martin Lewis, the self-styled "Money Saving Expert" seen on BBC Weekend Breakfast and in certain newspapers and magazines, has a weekly email newsletter and linked website, which is full of great info, if a little hard to navigate as there is so much there. He has even added a discussion/question forum recently.

MrBW and I have always had credit cards with rewards schemes. Years ago, my first PC was obtained free using the £1700 of vouchers that we got by using a GM Card for 2 years before qualifying to redeem the points when MrBW got a new Vauxhall company car. Then I played a game where I bounced £5K of expenditure around various 0% credit cards for 3 years while the money sat nicely stashed earning tax-free interest in an ISA (sadly this game came to an end when RBS realised just how many of us were taking advantage of their generosity / stupidity and changed their balance transfer rules). Since their advent, we have been using cash-back cards. Last year we got over £200 cash-back just by putting all our expenditure (including Mr BW's business expenses which are reimbursed by his company) onto cards. Not to be sneezed at.

This year we will be doubling this figure, at least. We are currently using a More Th>n / Accucard which offers 1.6% cashback for the first 6 months. As soon as that finishes in a couple of months, I have a Platinum AmEx 2% cashback lined up to take its place (that one is an invite-only, limited offer (goodness knows why we were selected ;), but the AmEx Blue deal is pretty good too). Just remember to close the card down when you've finished with an offer, then your credit file stays neat, and you can reapply 6 months after shutting the account and take advantage of their latest offer.

Different cards are good for different people with different patterns of expenditure, ability to pay off in full, or need to balance transfer from a high rate card to a 0% one. Money Saving Expert has produced a full guide to which of the 60 credit card reward schemes is best for you. And it's stonking good. Get over there and save / make a few quid!
(NB The comparison tables are at the bottom of the article).

Martin reckons that someone on an average salary can earn £400 a year by playing the cashback game to best advantage. He also tells you how to avoid the credit card pitfalls and how to get the best deal when redeeming loyalty (eg Nectar) points. Other parts of his site show you where you can save money on mobile and landline phone bills (my combined phone bill for 2 landlines (including ISP charge) and a mobile, for personal and business use, is less than £45 in total per month), get cheap consumer electronics, and the best rates on your savings.

Blue Witch will also do personal recommendations if you care to post or email your requirements :)

Thought for the day

Dear Lord,

So far today, am I doing all right. I have not gossiped, lost my temper, been greedy, nasty, selfish, or self-indulgent. I have not whined, complained, cursed, or eaten any chocolate. I have charged nothing on my credit card. But I will be getting out of bed in a minute, and I think that I will really need your help then.

Or, in other words, BW is still feeling off-colour today, so don't have any expectations for today's posts, will you? ;)

Did you know?

From today, New York bars, restaurants and jails all became non-smoking.

Gardening Witch

Today, despite the 19 degrees of glorious sunshine here, I had no energy, no motivation, and no real desire to do anything. Must be those pesky biorhythms again. I didn't dare look.

Luckily for me, at times like this, there is Mr BW. So, while I was sitting down opening seed packets and writing the labels, he was busily scurrying around planting to my instructions. I'm sure I must have been a Lady with a staff of gardeners in a previous life. I'm sure I couldn't have got so used to this so quickly otherwise :)

Anyway, a tip. This one originated from my Dad (a very keen, but thrifty, gardener), but I'd never really tried it before today. Even with a large garden, you rarely need to use the entire contents of a packet of seeds in one go. As soon as you open the foil sachet, the seeds begin to age and, over a few months, lose their original potency, so the germination rate decreases noticeably. So, after sowing what you need, knock the remaining seeds down to one end of the sachet, exclude the air and re-seal the torn edge using a very hot iron. We found today that the new Suttons packets are actually large foil sachets, and, for those it works even better, because you can divide the remaining seed up into several sections. For something like radishes or lettuces that you need to sow successively to get a continuous crop, you just open one division every time you re-sow, and, hey presto, seed as fresh as new every time.

Seed resealed in this way will also keep much better from one season to the next, and, given the price of seed now, that's no bad thing (I spent almost £90 this year on vegetable and flower seeds, and that included 10% discount and a few bargain packets at 10p due to the quantity I ordered - that may sound a lot, but, given we will need to spend virtually nothing on fresh vegetables right through until about November, it is good value for us).

Oh, and don't invite me round to your place for a few weeks, because I will be rummaging in your bin eyeing-up your cast-off plastic containers. Most of them make ideal seed trays...

I love the ACORN

I love the ACORN profiles of areas available from the UpMyStreet website.

ACORN stands for 'A Classification Of Residential Neighbourhoods.'

I must say, I am very naughty, and often decide how much I am going to charge someone for a piece of work on the sole basis of how they come across on the 'phone and what the ACORN profile of their postcode says. All's fair in love and business I say, and I know that people do exactly the same to me (that's why I always say that everything is negotiable - you've added on 50% to the true cost of the job I want, on the basis of my postcode, therefore, you're jolly well going to take it off again if you want my business :)

Basically, they say, there are 1.7 million postcodes in the United Kingdom, the average postcode being shared by around 14/15 addresses. The marketing-data firm CACI has produced this classification to include every street in the country, fitting them into 17 distinct Groups, which, in turn, contain 54 'typical' ACORN neighbourhood categories.

The idea is that streets of broadly similar people are grouped together. Your postcode is assigned to the type which is the best match with the unique characteristics of your street. This description is intended to illustrate likely consumer preferences and behaviour and does not describe a specific locality or its residents.

So, let's see how well their descriptive statements about the area around The Coven fit us, shall we?

Type 2: Villages with Wealthy Commuters
(3.2 per cent of the population live in this ACORN Type)

Well, our bit is a hamlet, and there aren't many commuters, even in the village bit, and the "wealth" isn't ostentatiously displayed. Quite the opposite, in fact. This is "old money" territory, not "new money". There is a difference. And if there are 54 ACORN types, we're a bit common, aren't we? Off to a good start then :)

Likely characteristics: These very affluent commuter villages are found all over Britain. They are located neither within the main metropolitan areas nor in the remoter rural areas. They are found in the highest proportions in Somerset, Oxfordshire, Hereford & Worcester and Wiltshire.

One false.

Heavy ITV viewing: Low
Ownership of stocks and shares: High
Microwave purchases: Low
Buying home with a mortgage: Medium
2+ Car Ownership: High
Population Aged 0-14: Medium

5 true, 1 false

Demographics: The age profile of ACORN Type 2 is fairly flat, though there are 20% more than average 45-64 year olds and 20% fewer than average 0-4 year olds. The ethnic profile of these neighbourhoods is very homogeneous - 99% white

Only half true for us.

Socio-Economic Profile: Although these are rural neighbourhoods, only 10% of the working population is employed in agriculture. This is, however, over 5 times the national level. Of the remainder, the majority are employed in services. Levels of employment in the professions and in managerial positions are well above average. Other key features of the Socio-Economic Profile are twice the national level of self-employed people and nearly 3 times the national level of home-based workers.

All true except one false.

Attitudes: People in ACORN Type 2 are very keen to get off the beaten track on their holidays, though they are not driven to seek out new destinations each time. They are happy with their standard of living. They rarely notice advertisements in newspapers and magazines and have a low level of interest in new brands.

All particularly true.

Housing: ACORN Type 2 contains many large homes - 40% have 7 or more rooms. The majority of homes (60%) are detached. However, at 77% the proportion of owner-occupiers is lower than might be expected, given the size and status of homes. This ACORN Type has over 2.3 times the average level of unfurnished, rented housing.

Half true, half false.

Durables: Levels of car ownership are extremely high. Only 10% of households have no car and the proportion with 3 or more cars is 3.2 times higher than average. The proportion of cars costing £20,000 or more is 3.5 times higher than average and there are also above average proportions of new cars and cars with large engine sizes. The proportion of cars which are company owned is 60% above average; this is lower than might be expected given the status of the neighbourhoods, but can be explained by the high level of self-employed people. 2.4 times more people than average buy new dishwashers. Purchase rates for electric cookers and hobs are also above average. The proportion of homes fitting new secondary glazing is 2.8 times higher than average. The proportion of homes using oil-fired central heating is 12 times higher than average; solid fuel heating is also much more common than average.

C'mon, I'm Value Witch. D'you think I'd spend £20K on a car? I want two for that price!! And I buy a new dishwasher only when the old one breaks down. The last one lasted 13 years. And it's much better for us to take the cash equivalent than the company car (as it would be for most people, if only they bothered to do the sums...). And yes, there was solid fuel heating when we moved here, but we now have an oil boiler and a nice oil Aga. It's navy blue (unsurprisingly), in case you are interested. And I love it.

Financial: These are very affluent areas with over twice as many people as average earning in excess of £40,000 per annum. There are above average holdings of most Financial products, in particular National Savings Certificates, stocks and shares and plastic cards. Pension provision levels, however, are only slightly above average, much lower than might be expected given the income profile.

No comment, but we do have a pension, lots of credit cards (but only for the benefits - watch out for a post on this soon) and absolutely no debt other than an ever-decreasing current-account mortgage that will be paid off within the next 8 years (touch wood).

Media: The readership of The Independent is 2.6 times above average and that of The Telegraph is 89% above average. Readership of all the quality Sundays is above average, in particular The Sunday Telegraph is read by 83% more people than average. ITV viewing is below average with 49% of people classified as light viewers. commercial radio listening is also below average.

True, but we don't read The Torygraph. Actually, we don't buy newspapers, except occasionally when we are on holiday. Why buy what you can read on the net for free, without dirtying your hands?

Leisure: Although 14% more people than average take two week holidays, proportions of people taking long holidays, winter holidays and holidays in far-flung destinations are all below average. Camping is very popular, as are European destinations. Ownership of greenhouses is twice the national rate, so horticultural pursuits are certainly popular. Rates of visiting pubs and restaurants are above average, though by no means high. Most outdoor pursuits are popular, in particular shooting, rambling, sailing and windsurfing. People are much more likely than average to visit archaeological sites and stately homes, and to spend time in art galleries.

We have 2 greenhouses. We used to like camping, then we bought a lovely Tempur adjustable bed and couldn't bear the floor any more (actually, we nearly can't bear to go away at all now). We can only go away in winter (due to the bees and garden), and don't go out that much cos one of us then can't drink, and anyway, we can cook better meals at home, for a fraction of the cost, which means we can pay the mortgage off quicker. And yes, we do have a Life membership to the National Trust, but only cos Mummy Witch was feeling generous one day.

Food and Drink: Grocery shopping tends to be done by car and very little is done on a daily basis. Deep freeze ownership is 40% higher than average, although consumption of most types of purchased frozen foods is below average, suggesting that the freezers are often used for storing home-produced foods. Consumption of fresh foods - meat, fish and fruit - is above average. Consumption of most packaged foods is below average, with the exception of dog food. Wines and spirits are more popular than beer, in particular port, sherry, gin and vermouth. Ale is more popular than lager.

Yer, yer, yer, but we don't eat dead animals or have a dog.

I've never managed to find a complete list, in one place, of all the 54 ACORN types, so can't tell you if this is really the most representative one for us, or not. It is quite interesting how they put it all together from a few bits of consumer research and some government-produced, publically available, data, though, isn't it?

Thought for the day

You don't have to blow out my candle to make yours glow brighter.

ROFL at the latest: "Google search: free witch spells to remove a co-worker."

I can do that, email me the details and it will be my pleasure :)

Blue Witch gives Mr BW a treat

Well, it's nine years, give or take a few days (I can't do exact counting), since BW last allowed Mr BW to have something he really enjoys. Oh what a cruel Witch I am ;)

I first got the idea when I was walking round Sainsbury's yesterday. Then I saw that the package I'd need was on special offer. Now, Witchy likes a bargain, as you know, and the thought of a bargain, and Mr BW's pleasure, were just too much to resist.

Mr BW got home from work before I'd finished putting the shopping away, largely due to a lengthy war-line consultation session during which I, rather than make enabling suggestions, spent an hour making the right noises while the person on the phone provided me with 3 sides of notes worth of good ideas that will be trotted out ad lib to callers next week. The best thing was, at the end of the conversation, the person said, "Thank you so much BW, you have been very helpful." Would that everyone was so easily pleased.

So, I produced the package from a plastic carrier bag and Mr BW's little face lit up. "Can I do it now?" he said. "Well... I said," doubtfully, "We are going out in about an hour and we do have to have some dinner first...". "Oh go on BW!" he pleaded. "Well, OK - but can you remember how to do it?". He clearly could, and he proceeded to assemble the other things that we needed.

Wooden spoon, tablespoon, whisk, saucepan, glass bowl (not just any glass bowl, a particular glass bowl that Mr BW owned long before he met BW), measuring jug. And he proceeded to open little packets, measure, mix, pour, heat and stir. Finally, the preparations were complete. We had dinner and went out.

On returning from our bee meeting (oh what exciting Friday nights Blue Witches have!) (which reminds me, the local town, as described yesterday, on a Friday night, really is a sight for sore eyes. I always have to stop myself saying something my mother would have said back in the late 70s (she's given up commenting on "the youth of today" now). But I just couldn't help myself saying, of one young lady with the shortest mini-skirt (in gold lurex) I have ever seen, "Bloody hell Mr BW, if she was wearing any knickers, you'd be able to see them!" Luckily I was driving at the time, or we might have gone off the road at this point, as he had been looking at something else when I made this comment.) Anyway, to get back to the matter in hand....

On returning from our bee meeting, Mr BW made the final preparations, and appeared, triumphantly, in the bedroom, looking excited. "Oh BW, it's been sooooo long, I'm really looking forward to this."

So, what do you think it was?

Thought for the day

In the book of life you won't find the answers in the back.

A Friday afternoon special, brought to you by BW in conjunction with Mr Wiz :)

Consumer Witch

From Monday, there are new EU regulations governing the sale of goods that will give more power to consumers who are sold faulty items. Current UK legislation in this area is already fairly tight, but these new directives now apply across Europe. So, if you buy an item while in Europe (so avoiding the Rip-Off-Britain prices we are often charged here), you have more rights than previously.

Full details here. Knowing my rights under The Sale of Goods Act 1979 and Supply of Goods and Service Act 1982 has enabled me to get a better outcome than I might otherwise have got in a consumer dispute on many occasions. Most managers in shops have no idea what the regulations say, and it's not difficult to blind them with a little bit of knowledge.

Worth a read now, and store the info up for when you next need it.

Well, that Value Day yesterday was successful, wasn't it?
Must do another one soon, see if I can elicit fewer comments :)
I was just trying to clear out some of my half-written post store, but I got badly sidetracked by War Line duty. Sigh.

I'm in a bad mood, cos we've run out of my favourite brew, Sainsbury's Assam. No tea for tea-bag Witch is like, erm, no I can't say *that* ;) Never before in the history of The Coven have we run out of anything. I am so upset. I have let myself down.

So, today, I'm going to moan on about the state of my nearest town. Where I will shortly have to go to get the requisite teabags. Some 4 miles from The Coven, and not the most enticing of places these days. it was OK when we moved here, getting on for 8 years ago now, but it has gone downhill, fast. I have two problems with it. The people. And the shops. Not much hope for it then, is there?

Once it was full of good hearted, salt-of-the-earth East Anglians. The sensible ones among them have now died or moved further north. Now my local town is full of two types of people, the obese single mothers with mouths like gutters, and the London overspill moving into the new estates (where prices start at £200,000 for a 2-bed terrace, and go up to £650,000 for a 5-bedroom with a garden just big enough to swing a Manx cat in (not that I would, mind you, being an animal-loving Witch, it's just a turn of phrase, honest), also with mouths like gutters. They'd sooner tell you to "f* off" than say "thank you" for holding a door for them.

And the shops? Well, once people moaned about the family-run businesses closing down and being taken over by estate agents and building societies. Then it moved on to mobile phone shops. Now these are shutting down and turning into tanning parlours, beauty therapists (sadly, no amount of "treatment" could help most of the town's inhabitants, but there's some money to be made here), nail bars and NOW, I noticed earlier in the week, tooth parlours. Jewels for teeth. Pearleese. It's bad enough my (private - you can't get NHS round here) dentist sending out glossy brochures offering me the opportunity to whiten my smile for £650, but teeth jewellery. Is that really necessary?

With apologies to those of you who live in cities, to whom this must all be such old hat.

Thought for the day

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"

- Eleanor Roosevelt

This Blue and white Value Day is interrupted to bring you a tale of extreme motoring stupidity

It started a week ago when I had to go down to Erith in Kent to collect some honey jars. There was a bloke on a brand new, 03 reg, baby Harley, trying to commit suicide in front of me. Three times I watched him do something really stupid. At some lights I pulled up beside him and calmly but firmly suggested to him that if he wanted to live past the end of the week he should either calm down a bit or book some advanced training. As I expected, he gave me an earful of abuse and asked me what the f--- I knew about it anyway. I was pleased to inform him that actually, I do have a full bike licence. On the way back to the M25 I saw him again, bike pranged into a bollard, sitting on the side of the road. I tooted and waved. Evil, but.... (and I promise, I didn't even need to do any spells).

Just now, heading north up the A12 in slow-moving traffic (in the car broomstick), a motorcyclist was weaving in and out of the traffic, filtering between big lorries, and even riding on the hard shoulder on occasions. He pulled right in front of me, clipping my nearside mirror with his. I hooted him and he made an impolite gesture at me. While his hand was off the handlebar doing this, the traffic backed up and he came within millimetres of going into the back of the people carrier in front of me.

He went on riding in the same way. The traffic suddenly came to a complete standstill, and then, after about 5 minutes, started creeping along. When this happens on this piece of road there is usually an accident blocking one carriageway. It was of little surprise when I eventually got to the scene of the accident, some half hour later, to find that it was said motorcyclist and a white van. By then a police car was in attendance, and I could see a lot of shouting going on.

I couldn't help myself stopping on the hard shoulder behind them. A second police officer got out of the car and came over to me. The conversation went as follows:

Him: Madam, you shouldn't stop here.
Me: [adopting best posh voice] I know, but I have information that might be of assistance in the case of this accident.
Him: Which is?
Me: Well, I saw him riding recklessly further back.
Him: How would you say he was riding madam?
Me: To put it bluntly, like a f*cking lunatic! And I'm a biker myself, so I do feel I'm in a position to judge.
Him: You don't seem like the sort of lady who would usually use a term like that, can you tell me exactly what he was doing?
Me: [said what I've explained above]
Him: [calls over to his colleague] 'ere, [name], this very nice lady here says that the bloke on the bike was "riding like a f*cking lunatic."
White Van Man: See, I told you so!

I gave them my details (3rd set of Blue Witches (as witnesses to accidents / bad driving) details the traffic police in this area have had in the past few weeks - oh what are we doing wrong!) and went on my way.

Then, coming off the A12, I found a lorry and a car with a trailer of motorbikes stopped on the outside lane on a big roundabout (fed by 6 lanes, 5 of which are dual carriageway). Near carnage happening with every vehicle movement, and the rush-hour traffic building fast. Called 999 (using my hands-free, of course). Then came home needing a stiff drink.

I think it's too dangerous to go out any more round here. I need to become a hermit, obviously.

Value Witch Day, Tip 4

You can get a £30 discount from your water bill if you can show that none of the water from your roof gutters or garden runs into a sewer. For example, if you live in a flat, or a house where the gutters run into rainwater butts (actually, in one year, the savings could pay for the rainwater butts).

The official site about this is here. And this is a site that explains more about it (as it applies in one region).

Apply quickly though, because it is a rebate, and the current year ends on 31st March. So, you could have £30 for this past year, and another £30 from 1st April. £60 for nothing, except 5 minutes to complete the form!

Value Witch Day, Tip 3

When my mother-in-law first told me about HSA a few years ago now, I thought she was joking, badly informed, or mistaken, about the health-care benefits you could get for a small monthly payment. HSA is not private medical insurance (indeed, it is a useful add-on to that).

For £1.35 per week, a single person can get back, per year (for expenses incurred in the UK or anywhere within the EU) half of everything they spend in the following benefit categories (which are defined here):

Dental: up to £40
Optical: up to £35
Physiotherapy / Osteopathy / Chiropractic / Acupuncture / Homeopathy: up to £120
Chiropody: up to £32
Allergy Testing: up to £29
Consultations: up to £68

Health Screening: up to £50
Hospital stays: £16 per night, up to £320 (20 nights) per year

It gets really good for couples / families, where, for £2.20 per week, the above benefit levels apply to every person in the household.

We have an old version of the current scheme, which allows us both to claim on each other's policies for each benefit, so we get back 100% of the cost of expenditure up to each benefit level, but, they no longer officially offer this to new customers. But, I have just rung them, and they are happy to still put people on this scheme, over the telephone, and on request, only (0800 08 54321). Our scheme is also a bit cheaper than the current one (£1.95 per week - paid monthly by direct debit), but, just to prove what good value the current scheme can be, here are the sums for me and MrBW (using the current rates):

Total annual subscription = £2.20 x 52 = £114.40

Possible benefits = £374 each (using all of each benefit category) + up to £320 each if we are hospitalised for any reason (if we had kids, it would be that much per person).

Usual benefits (if we just use optical + dental + chiropodist, which we always do) = £107 each.

So, even if we just both use the dentist (even check-ups and hygienist qualify), optician (even disposable contact lenses qualify), and chiropody (Mr BW's worst torture, he says, but I make him go once a year anyway, just to get value from HSA!!), we make £214 - £114.40 = £99.60 profit.

There are other similar plans around, and I have looked at all of them. IMHO, HSA remains the best value. HSA is a mutual company (so no money is taken out to pay shareholders and management salaries are kept at sensible levels), and non-profit making, so any excess income at the end of the year is ploughed back into medical charities. They also process claims by return of post (and will now pay directly into your bank account, although I still prefer a cheque as it's easier to keep track of). In 8 years of membership, we have never had a claim even queried, let alone refused, and have made at least a 50% profit on our subscription every year, and, one year, over 500%.

And no, I have no idea how they make the figures add up! I suspect that people paying higher weekly premiums (there are higher levels of benefit for higher premiums) probably don't receive the full value of their subscriptions, as they probably never use enough professional healthcare services to make it worthwhile. However, at the lowest subscription levels, you can't fail to be quids in every time.

Another bonus - usually there is a 6 month qualifying period before you can claim benefits, but if you ring up to join (rather than use the website), and ask about the 6 month period, they will either be magically waiving it on that day, or will be able to tell you when they next will be (so I have just been told while doing my research, like a good journalist!).

Remember two of BW's favourite phrases, "Everything is negotiable" and, "If you don't ask you don't get."

Value Witch Day, Tip 2

Did you know that the postal regulator, Postcomm, has given the go ahead for the price of first and second class stamps to be raised by one penny? And, the Royal Mail will be given the option to increase the cost of second class postage by another penny next year.

So, the price of a first class stamp will go up to 28p, while the cost of putting a second class letter in the post will go up to 20p, on 17 April. That's a 3.70% increase on 2nd class and 5.26% on 2nd class.

Full details here.

I post a lot of things (some things just can't be emailed!) and always buy the books of 100 self-adhesive stamps which are not marked with a price (ie they say '1st' or '2nd' rather than, currently, 27p or 19p). You can also get books of smaller quantities (from supermarkets etc as well as Post Offices). Stock up now! It may only be 1p per stamp, but it soon mounts up.

"Look after the pennies and the pounds will look after themselves," as my grandmother would have said.

Value Witch Day, Tip 1

If you use bags of garden compost, and dislike dragging them home from wherever you buy them from, you can get them, at very reasonable prices (at least as cheap as in the DIY sheds and garden centres), delivered free to your home (and stacked anywhere you choose) by CPL distribution. Minimum order value is £20. Coverage is to 80% of UK mainland properties.

CPL distribution have bought up many local coal merchants and now also sell all sorts of garden products in addition to their traditional range of solid fuels. Their website is a total nightmare (if I was doing an e-mystery shop on it, which I do for a couple of research companies from time-to-time, they would get some very handy hints! Ah, that reminds me, apologies to those of you looking at BW with Netscape, I saw it for the first time the other day and it's a nightmare, the promised Coven Makeover will finally happen soon, honest), and I wouldn't use it for ordering. You need to click on "garden products" to see the range they do (including John Innes 1, 2, or 3, bark chips, Levington ericaceous compost, Levington hanging basket compost, Murphy peat-free multi-purpose compost, growbags, Westland multi-purpose compost with added JI, paving, decorative aggregate chippings etc etc). Look out for the good-value multibuys.

If you ring the freephone number (0800 328 6693), they will send you a brochure of all the products they do. Much easier than the website! When you order tell them to note, "Please ring day before delivery," on the order form and you'll know to expect it. They are happy to deliver when you are out.

Right, it's Value Witch Day today, cos I imagine some of you don't want any more war. Just like me then :)

So, I shall be adding white stripes in to my Blue and there'll be a few ways of saving a few quid up here. Most of which will be absolutely no surprise to you. But just a few might.

Depending how many calls I get on the War Line, I may get less posted than I plan. In which case we will have another money-off day soon. And, these offers are open to all ages. Well, some of them are for over-18s only (no, I'm not about to list free porn-sites, cos I have no idea where they are (oops, I'm going to be deluged now, aren't I? :) ), you'll have to wait and see.

Thought for the day

"The greatest use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it."

- Henry James

So you thought the live pictures from Iraq were subject to editing, eh?

Well, how come the BBC1 News bulletin just now (4.15pm), showing footage of British commandos searching homes in Umm Qasr, included the naughty word beginning with an "f" being uttered by the Royal Marines concerned, four, yes four, times?

Oh, and for anyone in need of A Brief History of Iraq, it's here. Skip the first bit, and scroll down to the bottom. It's only a week behind-the-times. (Thanks to Mr Wiz for the link)

Keep the Internet Tidy

Just out and about surfing around, it is becoming increasingly obvious that lots of corporate organisations, as well as bloggers, are setting up mirror sites for themselves. Now, of course, the domain name registration companies love them. But, I am left with a concern. Already there are many out-of-date and neglected sites out there. This practice is just doubling the potential number. Those linked to a specific domain name will, of course, vanish if the domain renewal fee is not paid when due, but those hosted by ISPs in 'free space' or by Blogger and the like will carry on existing for very much longer. In the not too distant future, surfing risks becoming a past-time akin to walking through a town centre early on a Sunday morning. You can't help but stumble into piles of last night's [whatever] :(

So, this is a plea to:

1. All those placing material on the net: Please ensure you clean up your rubbish after you.
2. All those hosting sites for free: Please ensure you have a deactivation policy that is known to your users.

If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don't,
If you like to win but think you can't
It's almost certain you won't.
Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger woman or man,
But sooner or later, those who win
Are those who think they can.

Never one to side-step controversy, and not really content with the response to my fag hag post last week, or with the apparent continuing belief by some of my readers that it's OK to use that term (yes, I know, you can't change people's opinion by writing about it, but, I'm going to anyway. So there :)

Peter wrote yesterday, "As I say, a pleasant time, marred only slightly by Shaz's use of the "poof" word in my direction. I just don't like it, and normally correct people immediately. Then they always say, "Oh, I was just being friendly..." and so on ad infinitum. Yadda.

I took him up on this in his comments,

So Peter, why is it OK for you to use the term "fag hag" but it's not OK for others to use the term "poof" to you? Eh???? ;)

He replied,

The two situations aren't even remotely comparable. You would have to be either a poof or a faghag to understand.
(although, to be fair, he later says that he was about to change his comment when he noticed that I'd got in first).

Steve wrote yesterday about his take on the whole issue, although I think we need to await the promised part 2 before clarity dawns ;)

I'm going to leave you with my previous comment that is at the bottom of the comments against my previous post on this subject:

"So, where did these terms originate, who originated them, and why?

I wonder why it's necessary?"

I'm sorry, it's just not funny. Those of you who use the term, even in jest, need to think about this: a lot of people will pretend something is funny, or outwardly put up with it without comment. A lot of people won't risk confronting you (even if they know you well) because most people prefer what I call 'the quiet life option.'

Just something to be aware of. Please.

The score so far:

Losses to 'friendly' fire/accidents 18, Losses to 'The Enemy' (sic) 2

In the last Gulf War, one quarter of US casualties and one half of British casualties were to 'friendly' fire.

Thought for the day

There's a huge difference between listening to, and actually hearing, what is being said.

Moan time

Why is it that, round here at least, all garden centres, restaurants etc are now offering 10% off to older people, on at least one day a week?

I hate to say it, but...
By and large, that group of people have a lot more disposable income than the rest of us. There are even marketing companies these days specialising in flogging stuff to the grey consumer.

And, let's face it, this is the last generation who will have the benefit of final salary pensions, SERPS, and, during their working lives, had jobs for life.

It's not fair. Not least because my ticket to 10% off is still severely incapacitated and unlikely to be useable in said context this summer :)

The costs of war

What a weird day.

I started this morning with a day in the garden planned, got sidetracked from my post on gardens into a post on war (again AAARGGGGHHHH!), then got sidetracked from my garden by a request to be involved in a 'planning support for army schools in a different part of the country' video conference. Then, I got in from that in the late afternoon and sat down to catch up on some email and found that Mr Wiz had sent me some super cartoons on the Iraq situation from a down-under correspondent of his. I shall post them over the next few days.

I thoroughly enjoyed my visit to the local army camp. Some nice cute little boys. And they are just kids. Or perhaps I'm getting old. Some of my readers would have been *so* jealous ;) They give you *so* much respect. Even called me 'ma'am'. That's what they call the Queen isn't it? I could quite get used to it. But, I was left thinking of all these kids, just like them, out there in the sandstorms, alone, afraid, dirty, hungry.... Next week some more of those I saw today are due to go out. And then there's the "pram-faced girls" (to quote Darren) left behind with their babies. The ones who need me to co-ordinate their support.

And, as ever with BW, a weird co-incidence:

One of the young soldiers in the guard house was a lad I assessed when I worked with the army schools in the area who are now buying in my services again. 14 years and 230 miles away, geographically, but the same people, the same problem. And he recognised me (as ever with me, I remembered his name, when he told me it, but not his face). Then, over tea and fairy cakes (I know, the country is at war, but the army are still serving butterfly cakes to their civilian guests at home - and very nice they were too) I had to tell the major whose hospitality I was being accorded off for making jokes about his colleagues in Iraq. His little female captain told me that it was gallows humour and his way of coping. I asked her why she put up with it. She told me that to be a woman captain with a future you have to put up with your superiors. I told her it was unacceptable. And him. I think they respected me more after that.

Oh, and I had to sign a bit of paper to say I wouldn't disclose anything I learnt in the course of my work. So I'm going to have to be careful, aren't I? ;)

One of the (many) ideas I've come up with is to get the kids from the army schools (whose dads are serving in Iraq) involved in putting their thoughts onto a website. I'm trying to keep away from the pure blog idea, and hope that the schools websites might be used for the purpose, but already concerns have been raised. Well, I thought it was a good idea. I haven't given up on it yet.

And, on the way home, Johhny Walker's business news tonight was talking about the financial cost of this war:

$45M an hour to the US people.

The US currently has a budget deficit of $300 billion.

The US current annual defence budget equals the total of the annual defence budgets for the next 20 highest-spending countries in the world.

By the end of the decade, the US is seeking a $500 billion annual defence budget.

The cost to Britain is estimated as £3.5 billion. If the war goes on for more than 30-40 days (current budget), it will be more.

Good use of money?

As JW said, "It costs a lot to conquer the world" "America is no longer a super-power, it is the hyper-power."

Let's hope B&B don't fall out....

Signs in Spring

Always one to believe in signs, given that:

(a) The mains water at The Coven has been coming out of the tap beige in colour for the past couple of hours, and
(b) The electricity at The Coven has been off (albeit momentarily) four times this morning, and
(c) A camoflaged helicopter has been hovering over the field in the distance for about half an hour, and,
(d) Blue tits (come on, I'm Blue Witch ;) have been mobbing the bedroom window for days now, and,
(e) The postman arrived just after 9am this morning,

When my ex-colleague rang with the information she'd gathered for my perusal / information just now, I agreed to assist the army schools support effort. At present, by acting as a consultant / adviser on the end of a phone, to those co-ordinating. How exciting, I'm to have a local rate number patched through to my mobile. But only during office hours, and every third evening. So now I can do something useful. Just off out to an undisclosed local military location for a video conference with the top brass 200 miles away.

I keep trying to finish my "gardens are microcosms of society" post that I mentioned on Saturday. But then I get sidetracked. I've just read Raed from Iraq, which I was unable to get into last night (bloody ntl cache). I just don't have the words. I'd really like to put B&B's families in Baghdad right now.

Someone in blogland mentioned yesterday (sorry, can't remember who) that they felt that the ITV news was less biased, so, waking early this morning, we watched it in bed for about three quarters of an hour. We rarely watch ITV (and when we do, it's on video so we can skip the adverts). I was struck by how different the coverage was. Much softer, looking more at the human angle (an article from Oxfam HQ showing the sort of aid waiting to go in, the video diary of an AW (army wife) whose husband is serving in Iraq and who had a baby 2 weeks ago). The style of the presenters was much softer too. A bit like the BBC used to be.

There's been much made of the 'dumbing down' of BBC news in the past couple of years. Personally, I feel that while the content of the news has become more 'tabloid' in style, the 'authority' of the delivery has been boosted by the style and personal gloss of the anchor wo/men.

Much as the Sophie v Natasha debate seems to be fascinating to several bloggers around and about, I think that it just demonstrates my point. Sophie often showed her soft side. She seemed to care. Once or twice there was a tear in her eye. Natasha, on the other hand often interrupts, is dismissive, hard, and unfeeling. Her tone and manner of delivery and interviewing is hard, hard, hard. I know which of the two I'd sooner spend an evening with.

Going back to Nationwide, with which I grew up, there was Frank and Michael and their jumpers. Things moved on and smartened up, then along came a younger sort of female presenter. Ambitious eye candy, totally committed to their careers and with that cut and thrust and hardness so often found in such a sort of woman (which they would probably call 'professionalism'). It was a great loss when Jill Dando was murdered. Things might have moved in a different direction had she still been around.

I've always liked John Stapleton. Moved to ITV from the BBC when the regime at the beeb changed. He seems so human. His broadcasts from his hotel balcony in Kuwait City show him to have a level of empathy with his interviewees that I'm just not seeing from the younger reporters on the BBC. I watch the non-verbals, how they listen to and encourage those with whom they are interacting. This morning John was interviewing an English woman who'd chosen to stay out there. He listened to what she said, asked questions that showed his understanding, and extended his arm in warmness to her at the end of the article. Perhaps it's an age thing.

I think I'll be consuming a bit more ITV than normal in the next few weeks, to balance things up a bit.

Thought for the day

"When two people love each other, they don't look at each other, they look in the same direction."

- Ginger Rogers

Biorhythms

As a teenager working as an au pair in France, I can remember becoming fascinated by biorhythms. Nicole, the lady I worked for, gave me a book on the subject, and I dutifully read it (translating where necessary from the French), found it fascinating, and drew out the little charts for each of the 3 cycles / dimensions (emotional, intellectual and physical). In fact, I still have the book on my shelf, together with the well-used cardboard draw-round templates.

It may surprise you, given all the Witchy stuff I profess / hide behind, but I'm well-known as a cynic of anything at all non-scientific, and am always hypothesis testing before I am convinced of the validity of anything. So, of course, I tested out biorhythms by rating how I felt on each dimension, at the end of each day for a month. I then compared my observations with the plottings. And wow, were they accurate!

Biorhythms are based on the principle that how we 'feel' in ourselves is influenced by physical, emotional, and intellectual cycles. The physical cycle is 23 days in length, the intellectual cycle is 33 days in length, and the emotional cycle is 28 days long. Many people report that they can improve the quality of their lives by monitoring the highs and lows of these cycles and acting accordingly. For example, by scheduling important exams during intellectual highs, avoiding talking about significant things to their significant other during emotional lows, and arranging an action-packed adventure break around physical highs.

I hadn't thought about biorhythms much in the past few years, but reading a blog's life earlier, I noticed that there was a post on the biorhythm charts for B&B. I played with the link a bit and got back to the part of the site which allows you to plot your own. Before I did this I made a quick estimate of where I'd be on each cycle, from the way I'd been feeling and reacting recently. It nearly blew my mind when I found it was *spot on*.

This site also allows you to plot compatibilities between yourself and anyone else whose birthdate you know. For a bit of fun, I compared myself with Mr BW and with 2 other bloggers whose birthday I happen to know (you know what I'm always saying about not telling BW when your birthday is... ;)

Physical Emotional Intellectual Overall

BW cf Mr BW 37% 51% 44% 44%

BW cf DG 54% 100% 35% 63%

BW cf TD 77% 90% 78% 82%

And I have absolutely "no comment" whatsoever about this :)

Drat! Why can't Blogger display as entered on the screen - I'll sort out the table later, but I've got to go out now!

The next day: Can't be bothered to play with the table now, the moment has passed - but just wanted to stress (as I sense some misunderstanding due to the wording I've used), "compatibility" in biorhythms only refers to the degree to which your cycles mirror another given person's, which has nothing at all to do with how compatible you are to each other. My experiences suggest, as I mentioned in the comments, that the best relationships are often those with someone whose cycles are very dissimilar to your own as you are then able to be more supportive of each other at critical times of high and low.

I wasn't going to keep going on about the war. I have a couple of nice light jolly posts half-written, but I just can't bring myself to finish them, with what is going on.

So, I'll just say a bit more about the human cost of all of this.

Here's 2 facts to make you think.

The Bush administration has shown that it has a very short attention span on post-conflict humanitarian efforts. The White House didn't request a single dollar for humanitarian aid to Afghanistan in this year's budget. Congress had to take the unusual step of adding in $300 million.

And, much as we may all feel for those people who have been taken hostage, and their families, is it not true that the Americans are still holding people (including, I think, 6 UK nationals) in dog cages in Cuba?

BW says, double standards rule Mr Bush.

Thought for the day

Build your future on high ground. You never know where the next Flood will come from.

As you may have noticed, my interest in many things is from a humanitarian, sociological or psychological perspective rather than a factual (or surface) one.

I'm a great believer in looking beyond what is presented to get to the real issues. As I have been commenting around and about recently, I believe that the greatest evil of our age is manufactured information, manufactured 'lifestyle' and covert manipulation of knowledge. That, and the fact that too many people are prepared to blindly consume and take as fact and truth information they read or hear, without checking its validity by referencing other sources.

If the quality and quantity (sometimes too little, sometimes too much) of the information is wrong, I side-step that and look at the human costs, and human coping mechanisms. Much more interesting than trying to make sense out of nonsense. After all, the only real reality is the one that people construe for themselves out of their myriad perceptions. Order out of disorder via neural networks.

There is certainly plenty of manufacturing and manipulation going on in the world at large. This war is as much (if not more) being fought by propaganda and political positioning as by troops and hardware.

Of course, this is usually true of conflict at any level, but, this time, the situation is different, because of the huge advances in technology which are enabling first-hand, unprocessed images to reach the watching world. There may be too much information, but there are real, live pictures, and, it seems to me, many more journalists working at the very front lines this time.

Now, I'll put my cards on the table here. A source very, erm, close to me, heads up a business that develops, manufactures and sells advanced broadcast technology. Part of his sector is satellite communications equipment. If you're watching pictures from Iraq, chances are they will be coming out using technology that his business has manufactured and sold. All that is needed to broadcast live now is a camera, a few bits of electronics (as little as two small boxes I'm told), an amplifier and a satellite dish. The dishes can be as small as 2 feet in diameter and can fold up smaller than this. Fly-away systems can fit in a suitcase, and, indeed, a few months ago, your news came out of Afghanistan using a system that was carried into Kabul in a large suitcase on the back of a donkey (and when I find the cute little picture that is buried somewhere on my hard-drive, I will put it in here). Broadcasting is often done from dishes on the back of trucks or converted landrovers. There are larger SNG (satellite news gathering) vehicles out there too, which contain additional equipment that can edit and process live images on-the-spot. Some images are even sent up mobile phone lines.

Today I have changed the hover-text on my candle from "a candle for peace" to "a candle for peace and a rose for remembrance". I am also thinking of those families who have members out in Iraq, whether they be fighting, newsgathering, or whatever. The news of deaths from accidents, friendly fire, or even (it would seem, less frequently) 'enemy' (sic) engagements is now reaching home almost instantaneously. The families will have to wait for many hours to learn whether their loved one is one of the dead. That waiting time must be unbearable.

Thought for the day

Apparent randomness is all part of a much larger pre-determined picture.

I have just realised that gardens are microcosms of society at large.
However, as I have just watched Robert Romano's arm being ripped off by a helicopter's tail rotor while watching ER while eating strawberries with lemon honey and Italian almond biscuits on videotape, I am going to leave it until tomorrow before explaining that...

The Government have cloned Mr BW

On Wednesday a nasty looking brown envelope arrived at The Coven (actually, at 8.50am, brought by a new postman I hadn't seen before, so the spells are working, but only to a limited extent cos on Thursday the usual late bloke was back). I knew it was a nasty envelope as it said INLAND REVENUE on it.

Now, having worked, years ago, for the DHSS (when they were the DHSS) both in the sickness benefit section, then as a vacation student doing 'social research' in the Elephant and Castle HQ, then as a section leader when they took over housing benefit and had to reprocess everyone in a month (I said it was years ago!), I have the utmost respect contempt for government departments and their errors. And their ability to put right errors when they have been made.

So, I was dismayed to open the envelope and find a notification of a £100 imposed penalty for failing to return Mr BW's self-assessment tax form by the due date, January 31st. Not only had I completed and sent in Mr BW's form last summer (including dong the tax due calculations - well, OK, a nice piece of software did it for me, and worked out they owed us £12 more than my pen-and-paper calculations), but we had received a refund cheque from them in November (after numerous chasing phone calls to determine the reason for the long delay in them making a repayment to us).

With heavy heart I rang the number on the form.
The conversation went like this:

Him: OK, so have you got a copy of the tax return you submitted?
Me: Of course! [thinks: bloody hell, how daft do you think I am, I need to be able to put the same numbers next year, they took me ages to work out ;)
Him: Could you send us in a copy so we can see it?
Me: No.
Him: It would make it much easier.
Me: Perhaps for you.... I'll be helpful here, I can give you the cheque number for the refund cheque, then you can track it back that way.
Him: No, that's a different department, the computer systems aren't accessible from here. By the way, are you sure there aren't two Mr BW's living at your address?
Me: Well, there weren't last time I looked.... Come on, what do you take me for? I don't believe that you want to help get this sorted. And your name is *******. Hmmmm. Right, what's the name of your line manager?
Him: Hold on, I've just thought of a way round this.
Me: [thinks: well, isn't that strange?] Ah good, I was sure there must be a way.
Him: I can see what's happened now. A duplicate record has been set up for him. As there was no return sent in on it, a penalty notice was automatically issued.
Me: If that was the case, then surely a self-assessment form would have been sent out on that record?
Him: No, I can confirm that no record was sent out.
Me: Then how can a penalty notice have been issued when a return wasn't ever sent out?
Him: I see your point. Your guess is as good as mine.
Me: (quietly, but he heard) Probably a damn sight better.....
Him: Right, that's all done for you Mr BW
Me: No, I'm Mrs BW.
Him: Ah yes, of course.
Me: I'd like written confirmation of what you've done here, because I can see this one running and running. Once an error gets in your computer system, it often compounds, doesn't it?
Him: I couldn't possibly comment. But I'll pass your request onto the department that deals with these things.
Me: And they are?
Him: I'm not sure, I'll have to find out.
Me: [runs out of patience] Right *******, I'll leave that one with you. By the way, what's your surname and extension number?
Him: [supplied required information - the fool!]
Me: If I don't have the written confirmation within 10 days, I'll be back in touch with you ******* *******.
Him: Yes, I understand you Mrs BW. I'll make sure you do.

Faites vos jeux dear readers, will I?

Thought for the day

Better to regret something you've done than something you haven't.

I always knew there was a reason that I can't use jargon, in-phrases and buzz-words without cringing...

This from today's Plain English Campaign weekly email:

"Guardian reader Gareth Richard wrote to the newspaper's Education section this week to condemn management-speak in schools and colleges. He said 'In my staff room days, I had a wonderful little stamp marked 'bull****' which I used to annotate the more incomprehensible educational gobbledygook. Things are 'delivered', not ideas; water 'cascades', not training. The sooner educationalists use accessible and understandable terms, the more sensible their pronouncements will become. Parroting meaningless but long and woody words is the sign of a third-rate mind.'

I will be able to sleep easier tonight now that I know the reason :)

Jaffa Cake Trifle

Reading around, you're all getting so down about the war, and the shops are all sold out of bottled water, so I thought I'd cheer you all up on a Friday, especially those of you who are, or who should be, on diets, by sharing a BW Special. The secret recipe for JCT. But, shhhhh, don't tell Saddam, cos he'll want some too ;)

You need:

A packet of jaffa cakes
A tin of mandarin oranges (the cheapy broken ones are fine)
Either custard powder and a pint of milk or a tin of custard (DON'T try using instant custard, it's disgusting in this)
A quantity of Cointreau or Grand Marnier (ie orange liqueur) according to 'taste'
Small pot of double cream
Packet of chocolate buttons (optional)

Method

1. Overlap the jaffa cakes, sponge side down, in a serving bowl.
2. Strain off half the juice from the mandarin oranges into a cup (you can drink this later).
3. Pour the rest of the juice and the oranges onto the jaffa cakes.
4. Slop on some orange liqueur (the more the merrier :)
5. Make up the custard and let it cool a bit, or open the tin (made custard gives a more solid finished product, whereas tinned custard is sloppier, depends what you like).
6. Stir a bit more orange liqueur into the finished custard and pour it over the trifle base.
7. Put in the fridge for a couple of hours.
8. Either pour the cream over the trifle as it is, or, if you can be bothered, whip the cream and pipe nice little blobs on top and decorate with chocolate buttons.
9. Save a portion to send over to The Coven, cos we love it :)

You can also make individual portions in small bowls, using mini-jaffa cakes. This is useful if you have a greedy partner :)

I'm (probably!) not going to keep going on and on about this (and later I'll post the Jaffa Cake Trifle recipe as an escapist treat for the weekend), but, following a link from Mike I discovered a blood-chilling list of the possible ways in which this here war could turn out. Sobering reading. Requisite reading.

You're not going to believe this, but...
In a apposite gesture (no, Plain English rules) defiant statement against what is going on in the world-at-large, Blanche and Weiss have two beautiful tiny white eggs in their new nest this morning. Good D'Oves.

The book is now open - how many baby D'Oves will there be at The Coven before this war is over?

Thought for the day

Dreams are reality without the nightmares.

Now, I just have to say something today. Something that has been annoying me for ages, and which I hadn't actually thought through in toto until yesterday. Indulge me while I whinge, moan and lecture (the warning is in the side-bar, after all ;)

There are several slangy / derogatory expressions in English that I really detest and would never use. There are a couple that I feel are totally uncalled for too. One of these is the term "fag hag". Well-defined by mal Steve (as an aside in his post on the adoption of the term 'fag bangle') yesterday, "'fag hag' is also lingua-franca in Britain, and definitely has taken on more of the negative connotations of the term. Watch the BBC TV series Gimme, Gimme, Gimme! for one particular take on the british fag hag. We use it almost exclusively as a derogatory term these days, or perhaps in a tongue in cheek sense to a female friend we would be being 'play-bitchy' towards."

Now, the last person who used that term within my hearing ended up with his pint over him. And I'm not usually one to waste good drink. Note it was *his* pint though ;) And *he* apologised ;)

I find use of derogatory terms unnecessary. My Mother would love me to find use of swear words unnecessary too. For example, "Oh, Blue Witch, you have a much-better-than-average vocabulary, *why* must you use such crude terms?" Well, it's obvious, innit? To annoy you Mum :) I do wonder how much this mentality applies to those who use the "fh" term. A couple of gay men within my circle of acquaintance delight in use of the term at every opportunity, but, at the same time, moan endlessly about the derogatory words sometimes used against them. Look here people, you can't have it both ways. Treat others as you'd wish to be treated. Show some *respect*.

I've always got on well with gay men.
I have several "pet" ones :)
Why?

It probably goes back to my near-miss. When I was 24 I was 3 weeks off marrying someone when I called it off, because there was something about it I knew wasn't right. What it was I didn't know, and nor, I suspect, did he, at the time. After several disastrous liaisons with various married and older women, he eventually worked it out. I'm not in touch with him any more, and no-one understood why I wasn't interested, or surprised, when it was whispered in my ear what a near miss I'd had.

I actually don't give a damn about anything except people *as people*. Read my earlier post here for a bit more insight into this.

I get very bored with men who blah on about the same subjects endlessly.
Particular subjects that annoy me are:

- their kids
- football
- most other sport, especially combined with excessive drinking
- what they'd like to do with that woman over there (show some respect for heaven sake!)
- how many out of 10 she scores (and exactly how does that make *me* feel?)
- what they'd like to do with me given the chance (this one usually reserved to drunks at conferences IME)
- why their wives don't understand them (try considering the above points)
- why they don't need to understand themselves (see point above)
- what was on TV last night (because that is the whole of their life outside of kids and sport)
- their ability to laugh at everyone but themselves
- why they haven't got time for you (due to all of the above factors)

I get very bored with women who blah on about the same subjects endlessly.
Particular subjects that annoy me are:

- their kids
- things their husbands don't/won't do (for goodness sake, get a grip, you married them!)
- bitchiness about the rest of their social circle (subject of knife changes according to who is, or rather isn't, in the room at the time)
- what housework they've got to do and how much they hate it (get a cleaner for heaven sake!)
- why their mothers don't understand them
- why their husbands don't understand them, or themselves
- what was on TV last night (because that is the whole of their life outside of kids and husband)
- their ability to be bitchy to everyone but accept ribbing from no-one
- why they haven't got time for you (due to all of the above factors)

Oh what a great stereotyper I am today!
But, it's fairly obvious isn't it, why I prefer to look outside the "social norm" (media terminology, not mine) - I'm obviously hopelessly beyond it myself :)

I have always preferred male company to female company (my worst nightmare would be working in an all-female environment). However, in the odd extended period of singledom that I've had, I've continually been disappointed to find that some what I'd thought were real friendships (rather than relationships) with straight men usually got to the "I want to get into your knickers" point sooner or later. I hate the way that groups of men ogle women. There is a often a feeling of real imbalance of power (including sexual power) there. I hate the way that many straight men just aren't in touch with themselves and just don't have any desire to develop any insight. Don't get me wrong, I do have some close straight men friends (all of whom know the meaning of the term "respect"), and, you'll be pleased to know that Mr BW is *very* atypical of the stereotype I'm painting.

But, if I was asked to pick who (other than Mr BW) I'd prefer to be stuck on a desert island with: a straight woman, a straight man, a gay woman or a gay man, I'd pick the gay man every time. If that makes me a "fag hag" then so be it. Just don't ever say it within my hearing ;)

Hey, there's an upside to being at war!
The BBC have taken Kilroy off!

- BW, failing miserably to convince herself that there is ever *any* upside to violence -

Until this atrocious war is over, you will find a candle burning in every post here.

It seems safer than lighting a candle in our window at The Coven (knowing my luck the curtains would catch fire) as is being requested here, plus, more people will get to see it.

Please join in, in some way.

Just tore off yesterday's calendar page (which, for some reasons I didn't read yesterday).

It says, "I am multitasking when I am talking on the phone, trying to finish some paperwork, and trying to answer with my hands someone who has asked me a question."

BW says, this is a definition of the normal state of affairs at The Coven, not multitasking.

Where am I going wrong?

Thought for the day

Everyone is entitled to my opinion ;)

What a weird Witch-day

Some highlights:

My hairdresser and I worked out that she has now been cutting my hair for 12 years. She is brilliant. Gave up salon work when she had her kids, but still cuts for those she knows and likes. She could win awards, but has no ambition. Her kids are her life. I don't understand women who are so easily fulfilled.

A lady of a certain age at a coffee morning (even Witches have to network locally, sometimes ;) informed me that it was "an omen" that the moon was so bright and so halo-ey at present as, apparently, the September nights just before the Battle of Britain in 1940 were *exactly the same*.

A reliable source close to some of the top army brass still in this country reported to me that said bods are already talking of the war in the present tense, as if it has started.

An even more reliable source close to the defence industry reported to me that some Iraqi soldiers have already tried to give themselves up to British troops out there. Sadly, as war hasn't officially started, they had to be sent away and told to come back later. More 'evidence' for those who believe it will all be over in a few days.

Having just found out that my MP (a Tory) voted with the government last night, I have just banged out an email to tell him how disappointed I am. He and I are already on email terms, so I shall look forward to his reply. And you dear readers, will be invited to share it, on that you can depend ;)

Oh, and I've just noticed that ER is back on in half an hour. Happy Witch :)

I've written before here about the events that led to my breakdown (over 6 years ago now).

The biggest thing that I lost when I hit the bottom and found there was no further to fall was my belief in my own abilities and skills. When I gave up working full-time in a defined and challenging role within the education system I found that most of my identity had been tied up with my work. It was hard not to be, "Blue Witch the successful professional" and instead be, "Blue Witch who actually doesn't know which way is up most days." Probably because of how I mentally construed events to help me 'cope' and because I told very few people about what I had/was going through, it was tougher than it had to be.

I'd been brought up in an environment where, as Peter put it so brilliantly the other day, "My parents' love and approval had to be earned, and the wages were my intellect." It was never in question. I *was* going to be successful. And I was. I believe now that had it not been for my Mother pushing me, I would never have ended up in the mess I did. On the other hand, I would also not have the armoury of skills, experiences and 'things' to put on my CV that have helped me always to find a way forward (or a way of making a few quid) in the toughest times. It's a thin line. I'll return to this one, soon, because I've thought a lot about it since I read that line of Peter's.

As I've slowly crawled back out of the hole that was the inside of my very being, the hardest thing for me to accept was that when people gave me some positive feedback about something I'd done, they meant it. My experiences and professional work have left me pretty cynical about people's motivations sometimes, and I am extremely adept at picking up insincerity. I know when people are 'buttering me up' because they want something from me. I'm now better at recognsing a genuine compliment when I receive it, and there are people whose opinion matters a lot to me who have recently said positive things that have left me with a little warm glow.

I've also been 'suffering' a lot recently from picking up things from somewhere just before they happen. It's what has become known as my "Witchiness". I know all the reasons it happens, but theories of randomness and the maths of probability don't add up for me. It's not that simple. Yesterday while writing an email I had the realisation that, with the inevitability of war upon us, I had a lot of useful experience of having set up systems to provide support for children, staff and mothers in army schools during the Gulf War that could be called on. Within 2 hours of that I had received an email from someone I worked with at that time. She had thought of me after I'd sent a "remember me to..." message back to her via the ex-colleague I met up with at the training course I mentioned last week.

Now I have a dilemma.
I know I have a lot to offer there (wow - that's big progress to be able to write that!).

I have even got my past notes on the trauma management systems we set up before out of my extensive filing system. I even got excited about the possibilities.

But I also know that working at that level is hard, and doesn't get any easier, well, for me anyway, but that's just me.

If I go with it, it will mean being 200 miles from The Coven (that's not a problem as my parents have a holiday home near there where I could stay), at a time of year when my garden and my bees need me. Not to mention Mr BW.

There are probably other people who could do what I've been asked to do. Probably not people who have my first-hand experience of a similar situation. But probably people who are more stable than I am, and better able to cope with the pressures.

I don't want to end up with my head in a mess again (you see, I'm not 100% convinced that I am up to this, but I can't decide how much of this is my usual self-doubt and how much is likely reality), BUT I would like to contribute something positive to the total and utter mess that this war is going to be. People always forget how hard it is for the families of the people fighting wars, left behind and fed only poor-quality information. No-one gives them strategies to cope, and the permission to express whatever it is they are feeling.

I could help here. But I don't know whether I should?

Thought for the day

If at first you don't succeed, re-define success.

For the second time today, I find myself asking, "What is the world coming to?"

No, I'm not about to blah on about war. Sorry, but I'm bored with that subject.

I'm going to blah on about fuchsias. Much prettier. BW's favourite flowers. A flower of which one can never have enough. There are zillions of different ones, in all different colourways. Something for everyone. Pure magic, they flower their little socks off non-stop from May until the first frost.

We probably have about 30 or 40 different ones, but, despite keeping them tucked up in a warm greenhouse for the winter, a few somehow never make it through the cold days. So, every year, I buy a few more. Usually as 50p plugs (baby plants) and grow them on. A bit of TLC for a few weeks and you've got a plant that would otherwise cost at least £2.50. I also love making standard fuchsias out of whips (a standard fuchsia is one of those lollipop ones - a round head on a tall stem, and a whip is a 12" cutting that hasn't had the top 'stopped' (ie pinched out), meaning it grows straight and tall, rather than bushing out). A good standard fuchsia will set you back £15-25, but you can buy whips for 80p. OK, so it's a bit of effort, but, it's fun, and very satisfying.

So, off I trolled to the whip shop. That is, to a specialist nursery I know. And a very nice drive out there, through the glorious sunshine, it was too.

But, alas, it wasn't to be. The nursery have changed tack. "There's much more money to be made from selling ready-planted tubs, baskets and garden design services. Sorry, we're not doing plants for people to grow on themselves any more. Everyone's into instant gardening, and you'll find that most of us small nurseries are either going bust or going into more lucrative areas."

Earlier in the day I'd been ringing round local joiners trying to find someone able to make us a new back door (in a quality wood like oak rather than the softwood rubbish which is all you seem to be able to get in the DIY sheds). With one exception (and he's coming out to see me on Monday to give me a quote) I'd been told, "No, we're no longer doing bespoke work, just a standard range of bedrooms/kitchens for new houses now. Loads more money in it."

I dunno, what's a Witch to do?

If you thought you're having a bad day...

So is someone else.

Only he writes for The Guardian, not in his blog...

Wasn't someone round here wanting a job with The Guardian the other day?
There could just be a vacancy soon.
But, it seems like it may not be all it's cracked up to be ;)
(Thanks to Moi for the link)

I don't know what it is about me that makes children feel able to do, say and ask the most intimate of things, things they'd never dare do, say or ask round most adults.

A couple of years ago, when Queer as Folk was on TV, a couple of 8 year old boys in a mixed-sex group to whom I was trying to teach the rudiments of the French language were to be found rolling on the floor on top of each other in a rather (what the books would term) 'overtly sexual fashion' during a supposed role-playing-being-in-a-French-café interlude (discipline is everything, I know ;) When I asked them what they were doing, I was informed "Playing 'Queer as Folk' Mrs Witch." I thought quickly. I didn't want to go *there*, so replied, "You know boys, this is a French lesson, and so you call me *Madame* Witch, you really should know that by now! Anyway, which of you is the garçon, and which the customer, eh?" (and I got away with it!!)

Last night my ultra-bright 10 and a half year old grammar-school hopeful (well, he would be if he ever did the carefully-targetted-to-his-assessed-weaknesses homework that I painstakingly set every week, rather than sit in front of his PS2) looked me straight in the face and said, "Can I ask you something Witchy?" (I let him call me by my first name, as he's nearly 11). "I heard my mum and dad talking about something last night, and I just, well, wondered..." "Yes.... go on, ask away..." Said child looked faintly embarrassed, "Witchy, how old were you when you first had sex?"

I looked at him, held his gaze, then laughed. "How old would you like to be when you first have sex?" "Oh, erm, right, OK then Witchy, how do I do number 4 please?"

A few minutes passed. Said child ventured, "Witchy, you won't tell my mum that I asked, will you?"

What is the world coming to? ;)

Thought for the day

Don't drive faster than your guardian angel can fly.

Well, Dave, it took us a month after you recommended it, and six weeks after we saw the trailer on the hotel TV at Gatwick as we were about to go away on holiday, but we did finally get round to seeing The Hours on Saturday night. Your review was spot on. A truly brilliant film, goes straight in to my All Time Top Ten Films, if not Top Five. Don't ask me what else is in there, cos I can't remember, apart from Midnight Express (because I remember how shocked I was when I saw it when it first came out, I don't think I'd ever been more shocked by anything, at that stage in my life (serves me right for sneaking into an X-rated film at not-quite-16)), Brazil (because life's like that), and Death Becomes Her (because it was the first film Mr BW and I saw together, and, erm, I'll leave the rest to your imagination ;)

A film that BW managed to stay awake through, a film that BW would watch again this afternoon, a film that BW could find no fault with. They don't make them like that often.

If you like the sort of stuff I write on here, you'll love it. See it if you haven't already done so.

What colour is yours?

My bathroom is white.
All white.
Bath, shower, basins, wall tiles, floor tiles, ceiling, windows, paintwork.
Pure white.
Just like me.
Who am I trying to kid? :)

Anyway, I got to thinking last night, while lying in my nice bubbly Airbath (with the replacement pump that just cost £380 - well, it cost half that, cos Mr BW got his big teeth out cos the original one failed too quickly), under my 7 nice arched windows mirrors (not unlike those over at mal (where, btw, in case you've not seen it, there is a very funny tour of a must-have-been-tidied-up-for-bloggers'-perusal bathrom cabinet). Oops, nearly forgot what I was going to say there...

Anyway, I was thinking, I only buy bottles of products that are blue, or similar toned colours (pale green, pale mauve). That is, blue products, or blue packaging, depending on whether the bottle is see-through or not. Someone gave me a bottle of (very expensive - it came from Harrods - she delighted in telling me) special bubble bath (that's not what it says on the bottle that it is, but it is, none-the-less) at christmas. It was a mustardy colour. It is in the cupboard, and likely to stay there until the next good cause that requires a raffle prize donation.

Sorry, I'm a Blue Witch and I only buy bluey products.
Do you have a favourite colour of bathroom product, or am I alone in this tone game?

Thought for the day

A journey of a thousand mile begins with a single step.

- Confucius

The new grass garden round the dovecote is finished, we are really pleased with it, and it will grow on us, no doubt. In fact, in 6 month's time, I'm sure we'll be digging it all up again to split it up as it's probably too closely planted. Blanche and Weiss approve, and have spent all day cooing to us as we constructed it. We've even had a pair of mallards in the orchard, quacking along. And, unsurprisingly, the drake had a blue head rather than the usual green. You've come to the right place duckies, but, please, no ducks' nest, OK, cos we're a bit tight on space now...

Sadly, we found we had two dead colonies of bees. We tucked up 7 and a nuc (mini-hive) for the winter, and had 5 and a nuc flying today. The first time we have lost any bees for 3 years. They still had plenty of stores (food) so it can only have been the wet that killed them off. So, we have put the nuc into a full-size hive and are crossing our fingers. I love my bees. You just can't hurry, change or hassle them. They do things in their own time, they are their own people. I could watch them forever. Pure relaxation.

Have to go now - have to "Save our Kitchen" - I have a feeling that Mr BW might be in a popcorn mood again tonight - he admitted last night that while Mr Wiz and I were inadvertently creating village gossip a couple of weeks ago, he tried to make popcorn, but, not finding any popping kernels, he tried Ebly Wheat (a great ring-the-differences to rice or pasta, if you've not tried it) in the popcorn machine. Which, of course, didn't pop! I remember coming home and smelling something weird, but he told me it was toast... Blessed are gullible Witches ;)

OK, so I got up early cos I couldn't sleep and needed to get some early morning musings out of my head and into words, and what do I do? I start perusing a link that DG sent me yesterday. He's got it listed in his "Five finger-clicking good links" for Saturday here, but, I'd have missed it had it not been put in front of my nose. Where some people find all these excellent links is beyond me. However.

The link is to Kartoo, a visual search engine. By putting "like:www.yourblogsname" in, it will give you a little map of inner and outer orbit blogs. I've just visited a couple of my outer-orbit ones, and found them a pretty good match. But this had me sniggering quietly (I would have been laughing louder, but my Inner Coven is above our bedroom and I didn't want Mr BW to hear and wake up cos then I'd have to stop surfing and go and drink more tea, or something ;) Ron, you're great, I love your humour (an example - but, by no means the best, go and see for yourself - this, in his faq: "Are you a geek? Yes, but in some circles its a badge to be worn with honour . Also offset by my enjoyment of whiskey and smut"), you'll be joining the elite on my sidebar, when I next get round to updating it. Which will be when I get the New-Look-Coven on-line. That project is now 10 days overdue.... (sorry Mr Wiz, I know I'm a naughty Witch ;)

6 am.

I can't sleep and there's at least three (if not thirty) blogs going round in my mind, things that have been cluttering up my head for ages but are at last taking on a form that is tangible enough to express, and then maybe understand. At some level anyway. Maybe.

Leaving Mr BW ZZZZ-ing (poor love, he's so worn out after all the hard-lanscaping he did yesterday on the Blue Witches' mini-garden-redesign), I went through to make a cup of tea. There was a rosy glow in the sky, another hard frost on the ground, the hens were doing hen things (like, well, pecking at apparently nothing amongst the grass - I love watching them when they don't know I am, they are so natural, so graceful, I love the way their necks move and their feathers flow; when they see I am watching they crave attention and show off), Blanche and Weiss were looking lovingly into each other's eyes (did I tell you - they've built a nest!), and I, well, I felt better than I have for ages. I just stood at the big bay window in the lounge, looking out into the grounds and, well, I felt different.

It's another of those wonderful Coven Mornings.
The sort I used to have every day between August 1995 when we first moved here and some later date than that when I forgot what wonderful mornings were for a while a few years because of the noise going on in my head.

And I think it might just be another wonderful Coven Day.
The sort we used to have when we first moved here and we had the whole house to modernise and the whole garden to design. There is nothing that Mr BW and I like more than spending a whole day together creating something. I have the vision and the ability to see the potential of 'something', he has the skills to make my dream a reality, and to add to my initial idea to make it even better. We are both perfectionists and we would both rather not bother than not do a proper job. But we both get a huge high out of a project done well. I have a feeling that The Dove Garden is going to give us just that.

The weather helps - if this sun continues I may have to change SAD into sad or Sad in my sidebar. And we couldn't be having that, now could we ;)

Thought for the day

Since when was genius found respectable?

- Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Personal Values

Personal construct psychology is so interesting. I have found it useful, both as a way to understanding the differences in how I understand the world and how others do, and in my work with children and young people.

Personal construct psychology is a constructivist system of psychology developed by George Kelly and expounded in his two-volume work: "Principles of Personal Construct Psychology" (New York: Norton, 1955). Kelly was a clinical psychologist and educator, and the primary impact of his work initially was in psychotherapy and education. However, PCP presents a complete psychological system, and it has come to be widely used in management studies, knowledge modelling in artificial intelligence, and in a wide range of other disciplines.

Kelly was a keen geometer with experience in navigation and an interest in multi-dimensional geometry. When he came to formalise his theory he took as his model Euclid's Elements and axiomatized personal construct psychology as a fundamental postulate together with eleven corollaries, terming the primitives involves elements and constructs.

Kelly's "fundamental postulate" for personal construct psychology was that:

"A person's processes are psychologically channelized by the way in which he anticipates events." (Kelly, 1955, p.46)

He saw all people as "personal scientists" in anticipating the world. His first corollary, the construction corollary, states:

"A person anticipates events by construing their replications." (p.50)

This emphasis on the role in behaviour of a view to the future is what distinguishes Kelly's approach to psychology. He saw people as driven by the need to cope with coming events in the world and all other aspects of behaviour as deriving from this:

"A person's processes, psychologically speaking, slip into the grooves which are cut out by the mechanisms he adopts for realizing his objectives." (p.49)

These grooves provide templates for construing events which he termed "personal constructs":

"Man looks at his world through transparent templets which he creates and then attempts to fit over the realities of which the world is composed." (pp.8-9) "Constructs are used for predictions of things to come, and the world keeps on rolling on and revealing these predictions to be either correct or misleading. This fact provides the basis for the revision of constructs and, eventually, of whole construct systems." (p.14)

Kelly's clinical approach was based on "constructive alternativism", on encouraging the client to develop alternative constructs systems through which to construe life events.

There are many techniques for enabling people to elicit their personal constructs. Most of these are complex and time-consuming, and require guidance from a skilled practitioner. Several years ago, Mr BW went on a "Managing Personal Growth" course on which he was given a questionnaire on "Personal Values" that was clearly based in PCP. The person running the course had obtained it from 'somewhere', but couldn't remember 'where', and I have repeatedly failed to track down its original source. So, I use it, but hate not being able to acknowledge the author. As a simple way of getting to a person's core beliefs, I have used this extensively, with adults, and with adolescents and their parents, and have invariably found it helpful in providing 'food for thought' and usually some new avenues of thinking/discussion. I reproduce it here, in case it is of interest to anyone.

Instructions for use:

Print off 6 copies.

Make sure you have a good couple of hours to spare, where you won't be interrupted. Bear in mind there are no right and wrong answers. Just answer truthfully.

Fill in several versions (firstly, tick the 5 that are most representative of the person you are filling it in about, and then the 5 that are least
representative, then rank order each set of ticks, 1-5):


You should fill it in on:

(a) you on you.
(b) you on the most important person in your life.
(c) you on someone you don't like much but have in your life (you may also want to do it on/with more of the significant people in your life).


Your "most important person" (MIP) should fill it in on:

(a) themself.
(b) on you.
(c) on someone they don't like much but have in their life (doesn't have to be the same person as yours).


Then, compare and contrast the pairs, with the MIP, in this order:

- You on you with them on them.
- You on you with them on you.
- You on them with them on them.
- Unliked with unliked.

Obviously, see how perceptions vary, and note similarities and differences.

Set the rules first - no recriminations, accept the insights for what they are etc.

Underlying theory - lots!! - but the salient points are that everyone's actions/beliefs are governed and guided by their personal values (PVs). To understand yourself, and those around you, you need to understand what drives them (their PVs).

I've often been surprised how those people who I thought I knew really well are unable to identify my PVs and how wrong I've sometimes been about theirs. I guess that leads onto something else I have come to realise recently - check that others have understood what you have tried to tell them. Others interpret things in different ways and may not have heard what you are saying. Sometimes you think you have said something and they haven't heard what you have been saying.

But, at the same time...

Always say what you mean, at the time you mean it. It's too late if you leave it. I remember what a very good friend of mine said to me after his father died. He said, "Mike and the Mechanics summed it up in 'The Living Years'." I didn't understand what he meant (beyond the obvious message) for a long time.



If you try this out, I'd be interested in any observations/feedback you may have, either emailed to me (and obviously then treated confidentially), or in the comments.

Thought for the day

When others do something strange, it's weird, sick, or crazy. When we do something strange, it's creative, clever, slightly eccentric, or genius.

What's the difference?

4 dots and then D....o something with it....

How often do you shuffle papers round your desk?
How many times do you touch a piece of paper?

I used to run an "only touch it once" policy, but, somehow, that only works when you have a full-time secretary who is 100% in-tune with your way of thinking and doing things. Now, things just get pushed around, piled up, and annoying.

Mr BW has been doing a "Stress Management for Managers" course today. As I've said elsewhere, that threatened to be a waste of time, cos living with BW is pretty good training for anyone who has to cope with others' stress ;) However, he said it was actually quite good, and, flicking through the course booklet he's brought home (as instructed) for my perusal, it was basically the usual stuff, of which I have 6" worth in one of my seven four-drawer filing cabinets of "work resources".

However, one tip that I'd not come across before (but which seems so obvious that I should have) is this:

Every time you pick up a piece of paper, put a dot in the top right-hand corner. When you get to 4 dots, it's time to either:

1. Deal with it, or,
2. Destroy it, or,
3. Diarise it, or,
4. Delegate it.

Sad thing is, who do I delegate mine too? It's not as if cats, hens, bees, fish or doves can help me out, is it? Ah, I delegate to Mr BW of course! Silly me :)

A Magical Spring Dawning

It was well below zero at The Coven last night.
Outside, anyway.
The sun is shining this morning, with the promise of more for the weekend (sorry Mr BW, I have *plans* to redevelop the area of the grounds up by the dovecote, so you're in for a busy one :)

It's mornings like this, with the ground white from frost, the sun glinting off the whiteness, a chill in the air, and the familiars cooing, miaowing and clucking for food, that make me glad I gave up the rat race, abandoned consumerism, mediaism and commercialism and got back to what is really important. Listening to what my body is telling my head, and listening to what my head is saying.

It would have been my grandfather's 90th birthday today. But, he died 5 and a half years ago.

After his experiences in France during WWII he spent his life struggling with depression. In the unenlightened mental health practices of the 40s and 50s he was a guinea pig for so many now discredited treatments, which no doubt made him much worse. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder did not exist then and those who were affected were considered weak and a disgrace to their regiment.

I believe there is a huge genetic link to depression running in families, and I know that I have inherited it. I know that I have his tendency to over-sensitivity, over-concern and over-anxiety. But I'm proud of it. And, by recognising it, I can deal with it. And I think it makes me a better person.

I always plant trees when someone I'm close to dies.
It gives a sort of permanence and a way of prolonging and immortalising their being and existence.

Grandpa is a silver birch tree, that sits on the edge of the main Coven Lawn. It is a beautiful tree, with gracious branches and a brilliant white papery peeling bark. It so reminds me of Grandpa.

I hadn't remembered it was his birthday until I went out at 7am to throw last night's left-over spaghetti from dinner to the hens. But, I felt a weird sense of *something*. I looked around and saw the tubs of Spring flowers, in this year's chosen colour-way (mid-to-dark blues, mauves and cerises/magentas) [note to self - I must remember to blog how I paint with flowers through the different seasons and love my "objets" (old farm implements and containers) for planting them in], I felt the chill of the air against the warm glowing rays of the sun. I looked at his tree. And I knew.

Thinking of you today Grandpa, and thanking you for the extra "human" gene you gave me.

Thought for the day

Listen to yourself. You may be saying something important.

I hate the expression, "think outside (of) the box".

I almost walked out of a meeting recently when I rose above the ramblings and disordered thinking and came out with a constructive way forward and someone described my contribution in those terms.

Yes, I'm a creative thinker, laterality is my speciality. There's nothing I like better than gathering bits and pieces of thought, explanation, information from here and there and resynthesising them into something different and new that makes people think. I springboard from all over the place, I just never know what will set me off. But, if someone accuses me of thinking "outside of the box" I freak.

Someone is currently thinking inside the box though. And it's all in a very good cause. Mike is trying to offload £100 to Comment Comic Relief by getting 235 comments in a comment box before midnight on Friday. It all started here and the place for you to cost him 42.55p a comment (up to a maximum of 5, which = £2.13) is here. And spread the word :)

There seems to be a lot of analysis going on around and about in the blogs I read, either on a meta-level (e.g. here, and see particularly the 26 - at the last count - comments) or at more individual levels. The whole phenomenon of blogging fascinates me. It fascinated me for several months before *I* got drawn in, and the more I blog, and read, the more intrigued I become.

DG is on particularly good form atm, and followed yesterday's controversy with a link to a seemingly sensible personality test. Apart from the fact that it looks like someone's post-doc research project, and that I didn't particularly agree with like my results, it gives an interesting link that will apparently connect you (on the basis of your results) with other blogs whose writers score similarly to you.

But, do you actually want to read blogs that are written by people who are supposedly like or complementary to you? Or would you prefer to make your own judgments?

As I've mentioned before, I am in the very fortunate position of working for myself, as, if, and when, I feel like it. I had to give myself a verbal warning yesterday as I'd spent too much time blogging and reading blogs ;) But, just reading around at the way in which some people are being treated by the people they work for (and having been in that situation myself and felt utterly powerless to do anything about it - hence, eventually, my current happy status), I just wonder WHY do people treat others in that way? What is it about giving people a bit of "power" that makes them behave as the tyrants many of them do? I'm a great believer in systems theory, but no amount of (over-)analysis from me has ever made sense of this question.

I firmly believe in the old adage of, "Treat others as you'd wish to be treated."

It's a shame that more people don't seem to have heard of it.

Those of you in that impossible situation have all my empathy, and best wishes for a happy resolution.

Thought for the day

"Why should any one individual obey either individuals or groups or bodies of individuals?" or in short "Why should we obey?"

- Isaiah Berlin
in Henry Hardy (Ed.) (2002), Freedom and its Betrayal: Six Enemies of Human Liberty. Pimlico (Random House), London.

I was just looking through my bookshelf (actually, bookshelves, and then some) to find something and I came across a 1975 book by A.S. Radford called "Teach Yourself Computer Programming: Fortran." Cost the princely sum of £1.75. The words on the back say, "A modern digital computer is capable of performing over one million operations a second, each of which it must be instructed to perform."

Now, said book was the course text for a first-year university option I took in 1981. And, in those days, I was good at programming. In Fortran. On punch cards. I bet I've still got them somewhere, in my loft (if the mice haven't eaten them). How times change.

There's a hot argument on Iraq raging on one of the education email lists I subscribe to.

I've actually finally found some people who support Messrs B&B too :(

Some snippets: (spelling etc unchanged)

"We can agree that Sadam Hussein is evil etc. BUT USA's foreign policy since WW2 has been less about freedom and democracy and more about power and corporate domination. So like many others world wide I regard the USA as more of a threat to world peace than SH."

"To me its not that we may have different views. But the idea that somehow what happens is out of our control. That there is nothing we can do to influence events. This is what causes me concern."

They should be writing blogs, surely? ;)
It's interesting though, that of a list of nearly 1600 (of which probably 60-70% are women), there have been only about 10 different contributors, all men.

Update: I really can't stop myself adding this, the latest post to the debate, in toto, because I *so* agree with it: (again, spelling etc as per original)

Re. the comment "I can live with 'Pax americana' better than with Sarin, Tabun, and the fear of opening my mouth, as this email testifies...."

If the impending war was really going to be for the liberation of the Iraqi people from tyranny there might be some merit in it. However, as it seems blindingly obvious that it is really about liberating Iraqi oil so that the US can continue to increase its pollution the atmosphere and thereby accelerate global warming (having abandoned the Kyoto treaty and many of its other international obligations) it may well turn out to be more of a long-term threat to us than Iraq ever might be. Also - if comparisons have to be made with the Nazis it may be worth considering the situation in the 1930s that led up to the war - a very large highly industrialised nation (Germany) came under the control of extreme rightwingers who began to develop expansionist policies based on overwhelming military superiority. Doesn't sound very much like the current situation in Iraq to me but it does sound a bit like the US under its current regime. I am not anti-American but Bush and the people around him represent something very different to any previous US administration in the last 50 years - and due to America's new status as the world's only superpower there are no longer any restraints imposed by fear of the consequences for military adventures. I would rather just have "Pax" than domination by an increasing aggressive US, thanks all the same.

Cor, DG has written a great bit on categorising blogs over here.

I think DG is going controversial, as drD has noticed (in the comments) too, in his old age ;)

However, it's got me thinking.

What are the things that make *you* go back to blogs time after time?

For me, it's the fact that they are well-written, sometimes humorous (BW will laugh at anything after all), and have some of everything, a bit of most of DG's categories. Probably uncategorisable actually. A bit like BW herself ;)

Oh, and another important thing - blogs I visit regularly must have comments. And a willingness of the blogger to engage in comment-box dialogue. BW always likes her say, after all ;)

So, where were we when I had to leave you on Monday?

Ah yes, just arriving at the Posh Party on Saturday night, as Mike has noticed.

Strange how the impetus to finishing blogging an event disappears as the days go on, isn't it?
So, as I'm never short of blogging topics, and there's lots to do around The Coven today, I'll just give you the pointed version:

• BW *always* and *invariably* gets on with 4.167% of the population, the Sagittarian male. BW can spot them from 20 paces, and, being a fellow arrow shooter, there's never a shortage of conversation, or gags. Thanks to Mark (the sort-of merchant banker) for the fun. If you pop by (I did start telling you about blogging and BW, just as our taxi arrived, after all), do say "Hi" in the comments. And yes, I was impressed that you guessed what I do in 3 (no-one has ever got close in 20 before) and guessed my name in 2 (well, BW is a really unusual name, isn't it? :) ).
  
  
• Some Posh People are Bloody Rude. Walk off, or spot a friend that they just have to catch up with dahling, in the middle of tales about Blanche and Weiss.
  
  
• Some men can extract anything from BW - even the last glass of Tattinger champagne, from the last of 30-odd bottles, that was hidden and under direct BW control. I felt sorry for him. He said, "My wife says she'll never have sex with me again if I don't find her more champagne." Now, I couldn't let him suffer like that, now could I?
  
  
• In addition to strawberries and gorgeous runny brie (ever tried those together, using the strawberry as the biscuit? Yum! Amazing what you discover when in a lowered-state-of-politeness-and social-acceptabilityness-due-to-excess-alcohol :) ) there were some tiny half-chocolate (some white, some milk, some dark) covered florentines. I asked the host (a lovely man too, great at stirring pots of chilli, he can come to The Coven and stir my cauldron any time) if he knew where they'd come from. "Ah!" he said, "My wife went to, erm, Tesco's" (it was obvious that they usually ordered from Rods or F&M, or Waitrose as a last resort) "and I think they came from there." BW doesn't like Tesco's much, so wanted to be sure of a quick in and out to get what she wanted. "Did they come in one of those silver 'Finest' packets, do you know?" "No BW I think they were from the Value range!" (that blew his cover didn't it - the cupboards were probably stuffed with blue and white tins, and the carrier bags from posher provisioners were all for show!)
  
  
• The high-tech version of "Bon Voyage" banners is to have lots of computer screens with it as a rotating marquee line.
  
  
• It's bloody scary walking from Tooting Broadway to Balham station with £600 worth of 40th birthday present from Mummy BW gold necklace round your neck.
  

Thought for the day

Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.

Blue Witch goes to London again

Twice in one week, most unusual.
And now I know why.

When I need to go into central London for a whole day, I usually drive to the end of the Central Line (which takes me about 45 minutes), and then am guaranteed a seat and a reasonably priced, usually reliable, journey (£8 maximum fare). However, there being no Central Line, I had to resort to BR (or whatever they now are, I can't keep up). So, I stumped up my £20.40, plucked up my courage, and caught the 06.42am. No seats, and 17 people standing in the half carriage I was in (the other half being first class also had no empty seats or I'd have sat in one of them and argued it out with whoever if I'd been discovered (I reckon I could argue that I have a shoulder injury that requires me to sit rather than balance precariously quite convincingly)). Other carriages were even more jam-packed. I eventually got to Baker Street, had a very successful day training course (including catching up with a couple of ex-colleagues I haven't seen for 12 years, and being delighted that one, who used to be slim, blonde and very attractive, and 3 years younger than me, was now lined, fat, and brown with grey streaks - she said to me, "You don't look any different BW!" I just smiled. What else could I say?)

The journey home was even worse. I needed to go to M&S at Marble Arch, so caught the bus down Baker Street. Back to my old student haunts (I lived in Goldsmid House for 2 years - one of the UCL halls, which is right opposite M&S, above the shops on the south side of Oxford Street). Felt quite nostalgic and found that I still can't travel down Baker Street without singing Gerry Rafferty's ode to it. From there I decided to go to Tower Records in Piccadilly Circus, in search of a couple of hard-to-track-down-on-the-internet items, only to find the place resembling a jumble sale as they are in the process of closing and metamorphosing into yet another Virgin Megastore. I was then undecided as to how to get back to Liverpool Street, but, spying a number 23 bus, and dredging out of my memory that they went there, I jumped on. The journey took 1 hour and 5 minutes. During it I got hit in the face by the conductor's ticket machine, 2 Waitrose carrier bags, a toddler's hand and a handbag. I shan't sit upstairs again.

Back at Liverpool Street, the indicator board appeared not to be showing any platform numbers, but a lucky guess found me at the right platform just seconds before the 18.32 pulled out. The carriages were even more packed than in the morning. Talk about safety!!! And the guard said, "Passengers are requested to acquaint themselves with the safety notices posted around the carriage." Well, I couldn't see any! I shuffled down the carriage and was about to sit down on the floor by the door when I realised that the carpet was wet. I looked up and saw I was next to the toilets. Which had a "do not use" sign on their doors. The dreadful truth about why the carpet was wet, and what I had just put my hand in dawned on me. Disgusting.

So, I'm left with a few questions.
*Why* do people do that journey every day?
What *quality* is there to their lives?
Why doesn't *someone* do *something* about the conditions on those trains?
What response will my letter of complaint to BR receive? (yes, I already know the answer to that one...)

Thought for the day:

My Mother told me, don't ever do anything that you wouldn't want to read as headlines in tomorrow's paper ;)

Oops, the day has gone by and I haven't managed to finish telling you about the Posh Party in Twickenham where they served Tattinger and strawberries all night (and I disproved the theory that you can't get a hangover from drinking champagne), have I? That's just going to have to wait until Wednesday now, cos I need my beauty sleep as I have my second trip of the week to the Great Metropolis to contend with tomorrow.

I am a very Happy Witch tonight though, cos earlier I managed to get my mitts on a pair of Steve Earle tickets for April 2nd at Shepherd's Bush Empire. Now I don't want anyone spoiling things and telling me what a crap venue that is, OK? ;)

Now, that only leaves one on my "must see" list. And if I cared to spend £75 per ticket I could see her (JA) on April 25th too. I guess I'd like to see Bruce again (saw him at Oakland Park in California in October 1999) too, but at £170 a ticket, I'll give that a miss.

Huge round of BW applause to The Editor of The Independent on Sunday for his front page yesterday.

And this also gains the BW seal of approval.

The Blue Witches go to Town

Well, I'd have loved to have been in a fit state to blog this last night, but I will admit that I had the Hangover from Hell (first in ages) and was feeling like I'd done ten rounds with Mike Tyson. In fact, I still feel a bit off colour this morning. Rather pale blue I think. Still, Monday is wash-day, traditionally speaking. I guess I'm just feeling all washed out.

So, how did we come to be haunting the streets of South London on Saturday night rather than safely tucked up in our beds at The Coven as usual?

Well, Mr BW has a friend who is soon to be going out to Hong Kong to live. Some other friends of hers had arranged a send-off party for her, and we had been invited along. The party was in Twickenham, and another of Mr BW's friends who was also going to the party offered to let us stay overnight with her in Tooting.

Now, I've never quite been able to take Tooting seriously, as I was *far* too fond of Citizen Smith. Say "Tooting" to me and I just see that tank driving down the High Street and hear shouts of "Wolfie!" and "Power to the People!". That really shows my age, doesn't it? :)

Anyway, Blue Witch was really on form. "On form" as not seen for several years. Possibly even 7 or 8, with the exception of one night in October 2000 (Sue's 50th birthday 70s party, but that's a blog for another time). When BW is on form, the world laughs. Well, BW does, loudly, and thinks the world laughs along. Whether or not they do is debatable, but... well, frankly, that's their problem, isn't it? ;)

It took us two and and half hours to get from The Coven to Tooting (45 miles, avoiding central London) on Saturday afternoon. It must have been the frustration of sitting in that traffic, coupled with the pre-party spice of the curry in Balham, and a rare foray onto public transport (which also involved about 5 miles of walking, from Tooting Broadway to Balham BR, then from Greenwich BR, through the town, over the bridge and to the party), that led to BW leading Mr BW and Friend of Mr BW, and 2 teenage girls we picked up en route, in a mammoth sprint from a platform on one side of Clapham Junction to the other, then proceeding to continue the exercise regime on Platform 5 when we found that the train I'd assumed was ready to depart was actually standing at Platform 6 and not going to St Margaret's anyway. "Up, down, up, down, up, down, stop. Exercise is good for you, laziness is not." (I can't recall where that comes from - can anyone tell me?)

On the train from Clapham to Greenwich (couldn't be bothered to wait for the one to St Margaret's), BW started expounding to Friend of Mr BW on the theory blogged here earlier in the day (nice trains on that line BTW). Friend of Mr BW was in firm agreement with this doctrine, and we had an interesting chatter about it. You could see the other passengers listening in. Well, they were probably glowering at us, but, what the heck. As we got off, one woman we passed said, "What you were saying there was brilliant, much better than what politicians say, you should get yourself elected!". So, that proves that The Woman on The Clapham Train supports a BW takeover of affairs. Watch out Messrs B&B (great name for them, don't you think? ;)

So, we arrived at The Posh Party at 10pm. Stood at the front door we couldn't hear any music and got suddenly very worried that is was a dinner party (as we'd been told it was "8:00 for 8:30") rather than a party party. We were on the verge of running away when the door was opened by a butler. However, it was OK, it turned out to be just that the house was so enormous that the music couldn't be heard from outside the front door.

(........ to be continued later, I have familiars that need cleaning out, plus, I need some more paracetemol.)

BLOGLAND FIRST?

Oooooh I so love it when my spells go right. Once in a blue moon :)

Sadly I am not going to be able to deny this one as I'd planned, cos 2 people let the cat out of the bag by accident. Or by purpose, I don't know ;)

Anyway, he guessed. Although I am pleased to report that he hasn't yet found all of them. He got 8 of them (well, he had 7 up when I first looked, but then added one more to his hover list later):

There were questions about reflected glory, bars, weight (with a claim that the answer to this one isn't 38 haha), stars, magic hexagons, geezers laying on top of each other, chicken wings, art in prison and dave's age (I really think D 'n' D had too many doughnuts or happy pills or something and missed the point :))
(I think I've got you all, but, apologies if not, email me and I'll update. And thanks also to several of you who've mailed to say you didn't pick up the email in time but would otherwise have been in it.)

But, it has to be said...
It nearly didn't happen.

Considering that several of us had been trying to come up with a "good enough" idea since the middle of the week (spurred on by the frequent and persistent (I was going to go and count them, but decided it would take too long!) reminders by DG that it was actually going to be his birthday on Sunday)), it was only after I threw one of Blanche's feathers and a handful of Fluffy's fur into the cauldron on Saturday that the final idea came to me in a puff of pink smoke.

So, all credit to those creative people who managed to come up with such a great variety of puzzles.

I am really touched that so many people ran with this one. The spirit of Blogging at it's very best, I'd say. And a nice gesture to DG who keeps us all so entertained.

I was away from The Coven at the weekend, so Mr Wiz kindly put the BW contribution up (at 00:35). It was kinda spooky that DG then commented himself (at 00:47) (and I'm fairly certain that he hadn't been to The Coven in the 12 minutes between our posts) "There's nothing worse than other people going on and on and on about their birthday, is there?. Well, you paid the price DG. At least none of us forgot it :)

Don't forget, let BW know when your birthday is, at your peril :))

Thought for the day:

Bloggers don't get older; they just discover themselves.

The 12.35am Puzzle, in honour of Diamond Geezer's Birthday

What number is formed if you take a certain single digit number, write it down twice, then reflect the second copy vertically on itself?

Good use of time?

I can't help wondering what could be achieved if all the energy, time, effort and thought currently being invested in the Iraq situation by politicians, armies, protestors, commentators etc etc etc could be harnessed and channelled into something useful.

Similarly, if we stopped locking people up in prison for offences that would better be dealt with by community service orders.

And, allowing asylum seekers to occupy themselves in meaningful ways that were beneficial to them as well as to the wider community, rather than confining them like animals in holding centres.

Controversial Witch, moi?

Thought for the day

Deny everything, you'll get away with some of it! ;)

I'd just found Jon's text-translation site recommendation when the following plopped into my in-box courtesy of the weekly email bulletin from the Plain English Campaign.

"Journalists often ask us for our opinions on text messaging language, particularly when used by children. We usually explain that it shouldn't be a major problem as most messages are sent to one specific person, and the sender knows whether or not they will understand a particular piece of 'shorthand'. 'And', we go on, 'most children are bright enough to know not to use it in formal writing.'

We don't yet know what mark the girl earned for her essay."

Language evolves.
Hmmm...
Doesn't it? :(

Don't people amaze you by their kindness sometimes?

We are a bit fussy at The Coven about cleanliness and I hate detest abhor housework. I am so much of a perfectionist that it would take me all week to do it to my satisfaction, and even then it wouldn't be good enough. So, since 1991, and no matter how broke I've been at times, I have always had someone to do a couple of hours of cleaning for me every week. It also ensures that we have to tidy up The Coven on a regular basis.

We have a wonderful, thorough, kind, and conscientious lady at the moment. A total gem who has never managed to displease (unlike a previous incumbent who started stealing toilet rolls and bars of soap, but, that's another story). She is a young mum with 2 little boys and a husband who is trying to start up a new business (but hasn't too much of a clue), so they are pretty hard-up.

She has met my friend who was in the RTA (who is still in ITU, 9 days on) and has been concerned about her, and about me, running round like a headless chicken trying to help out. She turned up earlier with a lovely bunch of flowers and a card for me, "Cos you need cheering up BW". She knows me well, and hadn't bought the cheapy flowers from the local market or the soggy ones from the petrol station, but rather a bouquet of Tesco's Finest. I was so touched, not only by the fact she had thought of doing this, but by the fact that she must have spent at least half of what I paid her this week on them.

When she gave them to me I promptly burst into tears.
I don't think she'd quite banked on that!
It was good to get that pent-up frustration about being so inadequate and powerless to do anything in this situation out though.

Bargain Witch

It always pays to shop around and tell a few white lies when negotiating. Particularly when shopping for commodities you know are being price-hiked. Perfect example just now.

[BW rings Supplier 1 of heating oil]
BW: I need to top up my oil tank. I'm ringing round for prices. Could you give me your best price on around 800 litres, please?
Voice: That's 26.25 pence per litre.
BW: Thanks, I may get back to you.

[BW rings Supplier 2 of heating oil]
BW: I need to top up my oil tank. I'm ringing round for prices. Could you give me your best price on around 800 litres, please?
Voice: What's the best price you've been given so far?
BW: That would be telling wouldn't it! Come on, I don't play games like that, what's your best price?
Voice: Um. We can do 26.95 pence per litre.
[BW thinks quickly - she wants to play games, let's see how far I can push this]
BW: You're joking, right? That's the highest of the 4 places I've rung so far!
Voice: Oh. Well, if you tell me the lowest I'll see what we can do.
[BW thinks quickly - she's making the rules, I'll play along. And anyway, the last lot I ordered was only 18.0 ppl, and that was only 8 weeks ago. That's a 50% price hike. Plus I can't be arsed to ring round any more.]
BW: It's 24.55 pence per litre.
Voice: Hold the line please.
[5 seconds pass]
Voice: Yep, fine, we can better that and do 24.50 for you.
BW: Great, when can you deliver?
[BW thinks - hope they send the eye candy driver who came last time ;)]

Motto: Everything is negotiable.

I just saved £19.60 by being cheeky.

The small world experiment

(via a blogs life)

This is a special for Witchy, this one.
Perfect fit with Witchy fascination for co-incidence.
I even learnt about the original experiment when I did my first degree, so it must be worth repeating.
Do take part, I'm going to!

Details (original link here):

Lucky people often describe how they frequently find themselves chatting to a complete stranger at a party, or on a train, only to discover that the two of them have a mutual acquaintance. With the help of The Daily Telegraph and Cheltenham Festival of Science, I plan to conduct a very unusual experiment to discover why this is the case.

The study will take a few months to complete, and the results will be announced in The Daily Telegraph and at the Cheltenham Festival of Science in June.

Scandal at the Garden Club

The Coven is situated in a very spread out hamlet of less than 2 dozen other properties. Many such hamlets (most rather larger) make up the local Parish, which has a central "village" core. Said Parish boasts a village shop and Post Office, an estate agent, several pubs, a couple of restaurants, a butcher's, an antique shop and an art and artefacts shop. Yes, you've got it, nice Home Counties desirable area largely populated with well-off retired or very professional types.

Said Parish has many local societies and clubs, as you might expect. Including the Gardening Club. Quite surprising it's not known as the Horticultural Society actually, but it may just be a little inverse joke.

Given the whispery nature of such communities, I first became concerned about local gossip last summer when, during the local WI BBQ (that happened to be being held in The Coven grounds) I overheard two elderly ladies saying, "So BW is married to him [indicating Mr BW who was trying to masquerade as an old dear to get a free supper] , I always thought she was married to Mr Wiz." I think it all started because Mr Wiz and I often sit together at the Garden Club. And giggle. Believe me, there is plenty to giggle about there. Mrs Wiz and Mr BW don't usually attend. Mrs Wiz cos she has Lil Miss Wiz to baby-sit and Mr BW cos he prefers rubbish TV to talks on pansies.

Anyway, I arrived late for last night's lecture on "The Medicinal Properties of Plants." I found Mr Wiz and Mr Baker, the local Family Butcher (no, it's OK, he's not an axe-murderer, just a good-old-fashioned purveyor of good meat and other dead animals) sat in the back row (luckily they'd saved a seat for me) deep in discussion about, well, I'm not sure exactly what. Except that it concerned Blue Witch's morals and Mr Wiz's lack of them. Or vice versa, I didn't quite gather.

Anyway, the talk, by an extremely able speaker, a bearded Professor from the Midlands, was most interesting. In between choosing which bright pink cactus dahlias to order from Mr Wiz's catalogue, I heard several things that I agreed with:

Witches were the original herbalists.
Herbs are often overlooked in modern medicine.
Herbs can be dangerous (even fatal) if not understood and taken appropriately.
Diet is all-important to long-term health.
The most effective drugs are often those that rely on synthesized versions of naturally occurring plant extracts.
The values of many age-old cures are only just becoming apparent now.
Back problems are the biggest disease of our age.
Gin and tonic with lemon is extremely medicinally valuable.
Obesity in children is a major issue that needs to be tackled.

Thought for the day:

"Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact."

- George Eliot

(do note that it says *nothing* about Witches :)

Another question

Can anyone tell me how I view a list of all the files (photos etc) that I have uploaded to the Blogger server? And how I delete the ones I no longer want up there? Or where I find out? Thanks.

Evening question

Is it possible that terrorists have already released chemicals into the air round here which have made both me and Mr Wiz (oh great sorter of Blue Witch's pathetic attempts at altering code) crave similar sorts of things? Like, huge jars of pickles for example. A complete jar at a sitting, and we're both doing it, some 3 miles apart. Neither of us is, before you ask.

Mr Wiz also explained to me this morning what you can do with a mobile phone in vibrate mode. I am still recovering from the shock ;)

Exercise for the day

I have a bee in my bonnet this morning (figuratively speaking of course, but only cos I'm too new to wear old-fashioned things like bonnets, I do have plenty of bees flying around here now the weather is warming up). It's all Steve's fault. He started me off last night with his bit on rolfing, which, for those of you who haven't read it, is a so-called therapy aimed (it seems) at improving posture, or, IMHO, as I posted on his comments board,

"...to be serious for a mo - in common with most of these "therapies", rolfing is simply a license for the instigators of the approach to extort huge sums of money from (usually badly educated and gullible) wannabe practitioners, who then go on to extort further money from clients.

It is no more effective than learning to sit, stand and walk as a physiotherapist would recommend. Easy way to remember how that is -'imagine a piece of cotton is being pulled upwards from the top of your head, and maintain that position throughout the day.' "

I had an accident (actually, in the car that replaced the burnt out one I was muttering about the other day, when it was just 17 days old) (I will get off the subject of accidents soon, I've nearly told you about all them now, it's just a subject that is a bit in the front of my mind at present). Got shunted into the crash barrier on a dual carriageway by a juggernaut in the pitch black and torrential rain. This caused a nasty sideways whiplash injury which caused a nerve to become trapped in my left shoulder for over 2 years. The many sessions of physio that I endured (luckily at BUPA's expense rather than mine) taught me quite a lot about how to move and sit to minimize risk of injury, and strengthen my spine and back muscles.

And, I have always been appalled at how badly 'children these days' sit, whether at home or in class. "Perfect posture, perfect posture, do not slump," in early life will pay off in later years, as the deportment teacher at the Swiss Finishing School I didn't attend would have said.

You only have to look at the statistics for days lost from work due to back injuries to realise that all this stuff about sensible posture and skeletal management makes sense (can't find a link that's not a pdf file, but it is the biggest cause of absence. Or the biggest euphemism for "hangover" I don't know ;) As usual with this sort of thing, I never really paid it much attention until I had problems. Now it is always in my mind, whenever I am sitting or standing for any length of time.

So, I'm going to subject you to an irregular series of hints and exercises that you'd get from a physiotherapist. Except that I'm not one, so don't complain when it all goes pear-shaped.

Blue Witch's exercise for today:
Learn to sit properly at your PC

When sitting, your spine should be in the position that sitting on a 7cm wedge (sharp point of the wedge facing forwards) would force it into (ie accentuating its natural curve). If you don't have a wedge handy, and can't work out what I mean, get a thick book and tuck it right into the back of your chair, so you are only half sitting on it. You mustn't alter the position your legs would normally be in though (which is, of course, both feet flat on the floor, parallel, about 30cm apart (that's 1 foot apart, for the imperial amongst you, except that few people's feet are actually 12 inches long. Mine, in case you are interested, are just under 10.5 inches; I know cos I just measured them, just in case you wanted to know, and yes, they are big feet, for a girlie Witch, anyway)).

Now, we all know that you are meant to have at least 5 minutes away from your PC every half hour. And we all know that reality does not always allow this. So, at least every 15 minutes, take 20 seconds to put yourself back into the proper sitting position (described above), then close your eyes and drop your head right forward so that your chin rests on your chest and you can feel the extension on your spine. At the same time, push your shoulders back and together, which will push your chest forward, so you really feel the stretch. Hold it for as long as you are comfortable (10-30 seconds). Taking a set number of really deep breaths and letting them out is useful here (I usually do 5 which takes about 30 seconds). Then, very slowly, let your shoulders relax and drop, and roll your head back up to a normal position, "one vertebra at a time" (as Jane Fonda used to say in the days when she was the only exercise goddess about). The "imagine a string coming vertically out of the top of your head and pulling you slowly up" is a good image to keep for this. Note the difference in feel between the stretched position and the relaxed, held-up-by-string position.

This exercise also works when you feel tense, for example when driving along in heavy traffic. Do wait until you are stopped at the lights though ;) It is also good for times when you get really wound up at work - take yourself out of the situation and off to the little boys' or girls' room and do it in private. Try not to fall asleep there, tempting though it may be. And if the boss moans, give him/her this url.

Remember, I'm no physio so don't sue me when the suggested exercises put you in need of one. Take professional advice if you need to. (That's only a sort-of disclaimer, because I have led a lot of stress-management training in the past, so do know a bit about the subject, so don't worry about trying it out :)

Let me know if the instructions make sense or not. And no, although I'd love to be able to, there is no way that I can upload a video clip on my connection. And an .mpg wouldn't be long enough. BT say it will be 5 years, at least, before Broadband is available in this area, so don't hold your breath either.

Thought for the day:

No matter how much we do, there will always be something to do tomorrow.

We are the ones who have to set our limits. No-one else will do it for us.

I don't feel too much like blogging today, my head is too full of "what if ?"s and depressing thoughts, so here's a nice picture I took last week for you to look at instead, until I get out of this head free-fall.



Thanks, as usual, to Mr Wiz for reducing its kb size for me.

Various people around and about blogland have been mentioning co-incidences recently. One of my favourite subjects that. I suffer from far too many of them. Many, many, more than probability theory or natural pattern seeking theory can account for.

For example, yesterday afternoon I was filling up with diesel at a large Sainsbury's store. As I came out from paying, I looked up and saw my car on my left, on the front row of pumps (where I'd left it, luckily!), and right next to it (at the front of the next row of pumps over), my old car. Identical to my current car in every way, except in colour (my old was bright blue, my newer darker metallic blue), and age (new car is 33 weeks younger).

That was co-incidence enough, but freaked me out as the older car was written off when it caught fire (burning out the whole of the front end) at 30 weeks of age (long story, but it caught fire while stuck in rapidly rising flood water after a piece of thoughtless driving by a bloke in a 4WD - at least I got rescued by nice firemen ;)

The woman (a bit younger than me) who now owns the older car saw my look of amazement / horror / concern and asked me if I was OK. When I explained to her, she too was horrified as she had no idea that the car had been a write-off. I felt a bit mean because she wanted my name and address so she could contact me to support her claim against the person she had bought the car from, and I refused (I have more than enough on my plate atm without getting involved in someone else's battles). Besides, I justified it to myself by saying that had she invested £30 and got the car checked for previous negative history before buying it, she wouldn't have had the problem.

I have plenty more tales of similar co-incidences. I will bore you with them in the future, no doubt.

Thought for the day:

"Pop has become another word for corporate."
- George Michael, 27.02.03,
(during R2 interview by Jeremy Vine)

Missing presumed lost... but now found!

A *huge* thank you to Douglas who gave me the link to a "save our files" site (free/shareware too!). Mr BW has now managed to retrieve the hidden holiday photos from the CD-R. And, what is more, thanks to another part of the internet, we now know why they got lost in the first place.

I'm sure that most of you know this already, but, if you start trying to add new information onto a partly written CD without the CD in the drive before you start the process, the CD Creation software cannot import the information previously recorded into the new session, so apparently disappears it, because there is no proper linkage made. As long as you don't open your CD creation program until you have your part-filled CD in the drive you will be OK as usually the importing/linkage of sessions happens automatically.

Also, did you know that 15MB of space on the CD-R is lost every time you add a new session to an existing one? I always wondered why you can never get anything like 650MB of data onto a CD-R. Now I know.

A fuller explanation is here.

I've just found this apostrophe place, together with a little apostrophe test (via ablogslife). I'll let you know how I got on when I get the score from Ash (but only if I don't get more than one wrong, you understand. I didn't read the guide provided, and am only unsure on one. I think. Pride always comes before a fall...)

Update: Whew, got them all right. Only the third all-correct entry Ash tells me. Feeling smug :)

BTW, have you noticed how often you make errors of spelling, grammar or punctuation in other people's comment boxes?

Now I am so p*d off that not all the beer batter pancakes in the world could improve matters :((

All our digital photos from Egypt have been lost. As someone who has an appalling visual memory, I rely on the many, many photos we take to provide illustrations to the words about the past that reside in my head. When I say *bad* visual memory, I mean bad. Like, in the bottom 2% of the population. I couldn't even manage to help produce an e-fit photo of Mr BW if I ever had to. I have only a few pictures of the holiday taken with my trusty 35mm camera. But it's not enough.

Let me tell you about this double calamity.

Mr BW transferred the holiday images from the Sony digital camera stick onto a CD-R. The images were fine (we checked them immediately and later printed a photo from the CD). When he transferred some more digital images onto the same CD-R (note, not a CD-RW), last week, the Adaptec Easy CD Creator program that we were using came up with "create a new directory?" and he clicked "yes". Somehow, the original images that were already safely on the CD then vanished. We don't know whether it is just that the path to the images disappeared, or whether (somehow) the images got wiped (although as it was a CD-R I didn't think that was possible?).

OK, so that was no big deal, because the memory stick itself had by then been sent off to Directfoto who offer a very reasonable printing service (and, up to now, excellent quality). At £6.49 for 50 prints it is cheaper than using the ink/photo paper to do it ourselves, plus we don't then have to spend hours chopping them up. As they usually return photos within a couple of days, and it is now 14 since I sent the stick off, I have just rung them. The stick is apparently on its way back to me with a letter saying it was blank on arrival. The woman on the phone said, "I had a whole batch of blank sticks back from the lab to return to people, that's a bit odd, isn't it?" Erm, yes. More than odd. It means that some moron in your processing department wiped the lot rather than read them into the printing machine, obviously. And it means that we now have 50 less holiday photos.

Now, do any of you wise people know, is there any way of recovering the images (path to the images) on the original CD-R - or are they, as I fear, lost forever?

Cookery Witch

Judging by the tales I have read around and about recently, I surmise that some of my readers are rather culinarily challenged.

So, as today is Shrove Tuesday, or Pancake Day, I shall try to assist you in not making lumpy batter or burning down your kitchens. Actually, I am enlisting the help of Delia to tell you the basics. However, in True Blue Witch style, I don't agree with her on a couple of points.

1. The best batter is beer batter (that might be sacrilege, or more appealing to you, I'm not sure) (recipe below - and yes, it's fine to use last night's flat beer, provided that you can be sure it is only beer left in the can, glass or bottle ;)

2. It is best to use a very hot frying pan and a tiny drop of oil, swirled round over the entire base of the pan and then tip away the excess (or heat the pan + oil until very hot then wipe the excess round with a piece of kitchen roll, or an old handkerchief, if you must ;) Ladle (or pour) in the batter, swirl it round very rapidly and immediately tip out the excess that doesn't set. That's the easiest way of getting a thin, even coating.

3. Tossing is all in the wrist action ;) The inexperienced of you may prefer to flip your pancakes over using a spatula or by slipping them out of the pan onto a dinner plate (so that the cooked side rests on the plate) and then inverting the plate over the pan so the pancake falls back in onto its raw side. Actually, that sounds more complicated and potentially more messy than launching the half-cooked pancake into the air and hoping for the best. If it sticks to the ceiling or falls on the floor you can always drown your sorrows by drinking the rest of the beer I suppose.

Blue Witch's Best Beer Batter Recipe (enough for at least a dozen pancakes)

Place 4oz (100g) self-raising flour (if you've only got plain flour it will do, but self-raising gives a puffier texture) in a large bowl. Make a well (dip) in the centre of the flour. Beat up 1 egg in a cup or jug with a fork. Tip it into the flour. Measure out 1/2 pint (300ml) of beer (lager or bitter, it doesn't matter). Using an electric whisk if you have one (if not, a hand whisk, a wooden spoon or even a fork will do) start to mix the egg into the flour. As soon as it stops being all gooey, add 1 tbs of oil and keep beating. Then add about a quarter of the beer and mix again. If it goes a bit lumpy, don't give up, keep mixing, it will go smooth. Then add another quarter of the beer, beat again, and repeat until all the beer is mixed in. If the worst comes to the worst you can always push the lot through a sieve which will remove any lumps, but, if you add the liquid bit by bit it shouldn't happen. It's best if you can leave the batter to stand for 20-30 minutes before using it, but it will be OK to use it straight away if you can't wait.

Traditionally served with lemon and sugar, of course, but I prefer lemon and honey. But then I do have about half a tonne of the stuff in my bee-shed...

Go on, have a go - it's not difficult!
Let me know how you get on.

Thought for the day:

The most difficult words in the English language (and arguably the most powerful) are: "I don't know."

No Comments, again...

If you want to mail your comments instead, I will post them for you if and when they ever return...

Going back to what I was moaning about at the weekend (driving standards), and neatly juxtaposing it with my loathing of junk TV, I have just sat through Celebrity Driving School (for no other reason than I couldn't be bothered to get off my sofa and go and do something less boring instead). Shock, horror. The worst thing is that green precious stone from BB (no names = no Google visits ;) is now a dumb brunette and expecting a baby. And has so far failed her driving theory test 3 times. Keep death off the roads I say. And here's to regular Depo-Provera injections for those in similar cognitively challenged circumstances :)

With not much time to go before diamond geezer has to announce which of the birthday presents nominated by us (well, some of us anyway), he is going to buy, here's the Wicked Witch Guide to what you should vote for. If you haven't already, of course ;) Don't worry if you don't get round to voting, he'll probably cook the stats anyway (he's good at that ;) (whoops, there goes any favours for me for the rest of the year :(

(a) Clear-door cooler - about as useful to DG as a pork chop at a jewish wedding imho (with apologies to any pigs or jews reading). He keeps saying he doesn't drink at home and you can hardly turn up at a pub or club with your own Becks. Can you? I can't think of any other use for this. Maybe those who have voted for it could enlighten me ;)

(b) Flip and Faze tumbler lights - you need to decide whether you think DG is the sort of geezer who would want a flashing red light emanating from his East End abode. Or a flashing blue light come to that. However, if he bought this, he might spend more time at home, lulled into the false sense of security that having club-style lights in his own living room would give. Then he could write even more DG inches for our delectation (btw, do you measure blogs in inches like newspaper columns or not?)

(c) Provapor steam iron - I only *meant* that to be a joke. Wish I hadn't nominated it now. As DG says, he only irons 5 shirts a week, so he'd have to give it to someone who could make better use of it. And I don't want it cos Mr BW does all the ironing in The Coven (he likes rubbish TV - like Robot Wars, and Planet of the Apes, and Little House on the Prairie - probably only joking about that last one, probably - etc etc) and I only let him watch it if he's doing something useful, like ironing, at the same time. Oh heartless Witch that I am). Perhaps Mummy and Daddy DG would like it for christmas?

(d) Logitech Cordless Desktop Optical keyboard and mouse - one great benefit of this is that you can easily put the keyboard away when you are not using it so that fluff doesn't gather in the gaps in the keys. You need to decide whether DG is the sort of geezer who would be worried by the odd bit of fluff.

(e) Voice Commander remote control - I haven't been able to find any reviews of this product in any of my usual favourite review places. It also sounds far too cheap for what it is. Which suggest that it won't work, either at all, or properly, or for long. And as it is mail-order, there is 3/5 of no chance of getting your money back on it when it doesn't, without a lot of hassle. You need to decide whether DG is the sort of geezer who likes hassle.

However, in my usual way of coming up with the goodies at the last hour, I have thought of the perfect electronic gadget present for DG. I should have thought of it before, but it only popped into my head when I read his comment about maps somewhere yesterday. Its a portable global positioning device (GPS). You can get them for below £100 because I saw one in either Staples or Orifice World within the last month. The best I can find on the net in the UK is via dabs.com. You do need either a laptop or a PDA to run it through (although you can get all-in-one devices for about £250). I've already tried nominating a PDA as one of the suggested presents, but DG didn't seem to like it. He would if he had one though. Cos I love mine. And now there is a useful reason to have one, he might be persuaded to change his mind. I said might, OK? :)

Now, don't you think that would be more "him" than an iron? Leave your thoughts below, and also nip over and tell him, to be on the safe side.

Media gossip

BW's sources say that BBC3 ratings are down.

"The BBC's new digital channel, BBC3 is performing worst than its previous incarnation as BBC Choice.

Now that the channel doesn't have the big shows that ran for the channel's first two weeks - such as the Eastenders premieres it's struggling to keep up the ratings. The repeat of Eastenders got just 128,000 viewers compared with a peak of 504,000 last year on BBC Choice.

When the channel was still showcasing Eastenders ahead of BBC1, its audience swelled to 700,000 - one of the station's highest ratings."

Erm, no great surprise there, but that's the best I can do folks, sorry :(

Amazing bee facts

As The Coven Bees are beginning to fly again now with the warmer weather, I need to start getting you all used to the idea of hearing all about them on a regular basis.

So, a couple of fascinating facts to start us off:

To produce a pound (that's 454g for the metrically inclined among you) of honey requires bees to fly the equivalent of once around the world. One teaspoon of honey is the entire life work of a worker bee.

To produce a pound of wax requires 33,000 bee hours. Bearing in mind that a medium pillar size beeswax church candle weighs around a pound and a half and would probably burn for around 30 hours, that's roughly 1000 bee hours for each hour of candlelight.

Do you work this hard?

Thought for the day:

Don't listen to critics; just get on with the job that needs to be done.

Yippee!

I'm going to be a mummy!!!

5pm addendum There was a definite problem with Mr BW shouting at me at 10 to 2 to go and help move the hens electric netting from the orchard onto the lawn, where they spend a month or two every spring removing the moss from the lawn. Seems I hit "post" rather than "minimize". Luckily no-one noticed. Or at least, no-one commented. Phew.

So, to resume - Blanche Dove seems to have done an egg already! Unfortunately it fell 8 feet onto the floor and was but a shell with some white by the time I got to it, but, it shows she's having the right thoughts. It looks a bit strange sitting on the draining board next to the 7 large brown hens eggs from today. About the size of the end of my thumb and pure white. After I found it I spent the rest of the day trying to think like a dove and identify which materials would be good for nest building, and supplying them. So far they have rejected most of my offerings - straw, dead grass, old jerusalem artichoke stems and last year's fennel stems have all been thrown out onto the ground below.

Very busy day tidying up the garden, sorting out the raised fruit beds (trimming down raspberries, currants, gooseberries, putting buckets over the rhubarb to force those lovely tender pink stems, and cutting off and replanting strawberry runners).

Now it's off to make dinner, with our own cabbage and carrots. Well, what's left of the carrots, cos it seems that the mice, having left the loft, have now made a home in the raised carrot bed. And yes, we have lots of raised beds, cos it's very solid clay round here and we are tired of things drowning rather than growing. Saves the back too. Planning ahead for our old age here ;) And what did that lazy fluffy ginger cat do? Not chase mice, but sit and snooze in the sun all day. In my next life I am going to be a cat. Well, a Coven Cat anyway.

Thought for the day:

Happiness is moment to moment.
We always note its passing, yet rarely see its coming.

Note to self

Never, ever, put the name of any media person in BW again.

In the past few hours I have had umpteen Google hits along the lines of Ms D

Driving me mad - whinge and moan time

With everything that is going on at the moment, I feel a need to have a rant. I won't be offended if you nip off somewhere more cheerful.

Ever since a very dear friend of mine was killed by a drunk driver when I was 17 (he was a pedestrian, on the pavement), I have been passionate about the folly of driving while under the influence of drink or drugs. Several times when I was in my 20s I physically took keys away from people who were planning to drive after indulging. On 3 occasions I have called 999 to alert the police to people seriously out of their heads and getting into their cars (long, long, before the days of the dedicated telephone number for this purpose). I would have absolutely no hesitation in doing so again. If you were drinking excessively near me and then planned to go home in your car, if I couldn't persuade you not to, I'd call the police. That is how strongly I feel about it. I can count on one hand (with fingers to spare) the times that I have had a drink (one drink that is) and then driven home. I just don't do it. I'm not a goody-goody, I just know that I couldn't live with the potential consequences of having killed someone.

Dangerous driving is something that makes my blood boil nearly as much.

Round here discourteous driving is the norm. I won't stereotype, but the worst offenders are men in executive style company cars or white vans, and women in people carriers. I define "discourteous driving" as someone doing something that causes another road user to be inconvenienced and have to change their direction or speed to compensate. For example, someone who overtakes and then has to pull back in before completing the manoeuvre due to oncoming traffic, causing the car being pulled in on to have to brake, or someone who refuses to obey the unwritten rule of feed one by one when two lanes of traffic merge into one.

I am constantly amazed by how many people seem to believe that their little metal box will protect them from any calamity their bad driving may cause them. I am constantly amazed by the way in which some people on the road don't look further ahead than the end of their bonnets.

You may remember that Mr BW witnessed an accident a few weeks ago?

Well, on Thursday he saw another one, and again stopped and called the emergency services (so, that's 2 emergency calls to him and 5 to BW now, he's catching up fast). After what happened last time, I was fairly surprised that he stopped at all. However, when he explained what had happened, I understood why he wanted to have a personal word with the drivers concerned.

Traffic into the town where Mr BW works has increased probably ten-fold in the seven and a half years he has been doing the 9.4 mile journey to work every day. In school holiday time the journey takes 15-20 minutes. The rest of the time it takes 40. Traffic is bumper-to-bumper, and slow moving from the time he gets to the main road 2.2 miles from The Coven. There is no point trying to overtake, but people still do. One particular stretch of road to the north of the town is wide and straight and has a 60mph speed limit. Previous accidents have led to a cross-hatched area (bordered with a broken line) being painted down the centre of the road. The Highway Code, Rule 109, states:

"Areas of white diagonal stripes or chevrons painted on the road. These are to separate traffic lanes or to protect traffic turning right.
* If the area is bordered by a solid white line, you should not enter it except in an emergency.
* If the area is bordered by a broken white line, you should not enter the area unless it is necessary and you can see that it is safe to do so.
* If the area is on a motorway and consists of a triangle bounded by continuous white lines marked by chevrons, you MUST NOT enter it except in an emergency.
Laws MT(E&W)R regs 5, 9,& 10 & MT(S)R regs 4, 8 & 9"

A Fiat Punto with 2 men in it decided, despite the solid, slow-moving traffic, to overtake across the hatching. The bend in the road meant that they could not see the oncoming builders' truck. The car hit the lorry, spinning both vehicles. Luckily, no-one was hurt, and somehow, despite the heavy continuous traffic, no other vehicle was involved.

Mr BW asked both the passenger and the driver of the Fiat what had happened. The passenger said (wait for this), "I don't know, I had my hands over my eyes and kept telling him to stop." The driver said, "I was in a hurry and what were the chances of there being something coming the other way anyway?" Erm, at that time in the morning, 100%. Idiot.

I sincerely hope the police prosecute him for dangerous driving. I suspect they won't as no-one was injured and they don't want the paperwork.

So, what is the solution to all these bad driving problems?

Easy.

Adopt the practice of many American States.
If someone is seen to be driving irresponsibly, or has an at-fault accident, make them go and sit through some "traffic school", at their expense. Much more useful than giving them penalty points or fines. An hour or two of video footage, some slides of RTA injuries and some basic driver re-education (including basic first aid) should make them think a bit. And, if someone ends up at traffic school more than twice in a year they should have their licence revoked. Holding a driving licence is a privilege, not a right.

Oh, and why not test your own roadcraft knowledge by taking a mock theory test? I've just done the car and bike tests and learnt something, despite having purchased (and read) a new Highway Code a few weeks back.

Drive safely.

Thought for the day:

Why is it that people rarely comment when they read depressing posts?