Blue Witch

Blue Moon, Part 3

*rubs hands*

Spells coming along nicely, helped by The Blue Moon.

Well, I now have 15 bloggers (well, OK, 11 bloggers, 3 partners and a dog) at The Coven.

It *has* cost me a hen familiar (I couldn't keep the spells for the ill hen going alongside those distractionary spells).

But we're all having a great time and I'm sure I/they will tell you all about it later :)

Elsie is busy deleting all my photos (she says she's looking at them), so there may never be any evidence...

Who else am I holding captive?

Blue Moon, Part 2

*stirs cauldron*
*looks at Moon*

Bugger, it was orange.
Must do better on that one for tomorrow.
Good job I started practising a day early.

*smiles contentedly and prepares to tuck 2 already captured bloggers up in bed*

It really drained my Powers getting that plane diverted from Nice to Stansted ;)

Blue Moon, Part 1

*stirs cauldron*
*basks in 31.9 degrees*
*cackles evilly*

Coming along nicely my spell :)

Thought for the day

If you assume that there's no hope, you guarantee that there will be no hope.

- Noam Chomsky

Briefly

Truly wonderful day today. Hot, but tiring and satisying. No time to write it up properly - that will have to wait until next week, because the Blue Moon approacheth and weird goings on occur at Covens at such times ;)

Came back tonight to find The Coven over-run with flying ants.

Being very organic and a Friendly Witch to almost all reasonably behaved creatures, I rarely need to resort to chemicals. Indeed, I often ignore pests and let nature take its course. However, these were everywhere, really making a nuisance of themselves. And, there comes a time when enough is enough, and I had to spray them. Nasty, annoying, flighty, stingy things. Even Mr BW, who is usually more forgiving towards such transgressions of The Coven Code, agreed with me.

More about my crafty course and the thing I did today that I never expected to do anon.

Thursday

My spells are going very nicely thank you.

e's updated us on her travels (and we find out what we're truly worth to her ;)), summer's finally come to The Coven, and I'm off for a nice relaxing crafty time.

And my other preparatory spells, the ones we can't mention, yet, are going well too ;)

*cackles evilly and flies out of the window door*

Thought for the day

Cowardice asks...."Is it safe?"
Expedience asks...."Is it politic?"
Vanity asks...."Is it popular?"

There comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, politic, nor popular, but one must take it because it is right.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Dovetailed

How do birds decide who is the leader when they are flying in formation?
And, when to swop over?

Just watching the D'Oves flying round in the glorious sunshine, it struck me just how amazing their ability to engage in absolutely perfectly symmetrical flying really is.

There's one of the white squadron with a black tail, and s/he (?) is almost invariably centrally placed.

The true story

Well, it seems we're about to discover just how 'free' our right to speak is, in this country.

A parody of the Government's 'Preparing for Emergencies' website has just appeared here - presumably because some civil service planning process failed to notice that it had been recommended in Document 10.093, para 12 (a) [ix] that £2.95 should be spent on registering each domain name similar to the 'real' site.

But, visit quickly, I don't expect it will be around for long...

(I nicked this from Vaughan who nicked it from elsewhere)

Thought for the day

Do you believe everything you read on the internet?

Float, float on...

Beautiful early morning here today. All summery at last. Amazing light.

Hot air balloon took off from 2 fields over, and floated serenely over The Coven, just like we did nearly 2 years ago. Only we went late rather than early.

Watching it for a few minutes as it rose, then drifted by, reminded me of the utter peace and tranquility that is to be found in the basket of a balloon.

And the wonderful images just waiting to be captured.

Thought for the day

Use what talents you possess; the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best.

- Henry van Dyke

Issues

I'm beginning to wonder what's wrong with me.

There are plenty of issues around that would, in days of old, have caused me to happily rattle off a few hundred words and stimulate some discussion. Some motivation seems to have disappeared somewhere in the last few weeks.

Example issues - last week - the acceptance by the HF&EA that it's OK for couples to have more genetically manipulated children in order to harvest cells in an attempt to cure an exisiting child's medical problems, and Peter Mandleson's new 'job'...

This week - the new £8M anti-terrorism advice campaign and the fact that I've given up watching Big Brother mid-series...
(I'd find some links but even Google's down - "Server Error The service you requested is not available at this time. Service error -27" - I've never seen that before - Google must also have lost interest :)).

The fact that Mr Farmer has allowed his set-aside wide field border (lots of lolly from the EU CAP for that) to set seed (dandelions and chickweed) which has blown all over The Coven Grounds (quite literally, millions of seeds, each of which will require to be painstakingly removed from wherever they've landed next year) would normally have had me ranting... but no...

I even couldn't get worked up by the usual agent provacateur's response to my response to Nixon's excellent guest post over at mike's about his dislike of the gay scene (NB not work-safe). I'm sorry, but I do think that a lot of people from whatever 'minority' make issues out of things that are not issues connected with their particular minority or social grouping, but rather issues that stem from the way society as a whole is going. As I said:

"But, at the risk of being accused of 'not understanding' because I'm not gay, I honestly don't think this is only about gay culture.

Does it not equally apply to anyone who chooses not to follow the predominantly media-determined 'mainstream lifestyle' for whatever their preferred sexuality at any time might be?

By not having kids, not working in a 'conventional' way, and despising consumerism and materialism, I often feel very much on the outside of everything. It used to bother me. Now it bothers me more that other people are forced/driven into ways of existing with which they are not necessarily comfortable, in order to (attempt to) secure 'acceptance'.

Surely it's more about being an individual and respecting people's rights to be individuals (regardless of sexuality or any other potentially discriminatory quality), and not having to follow the herd to get a sense of self-esteem and acceptance?"

Go and read the post and the other comments and see what you think.

And congratulations to Mr Piggy for having the courage of his convictions and being the fourth member of my blogroll to be accused of something they haven't done by the usual agent provocateur. You know you've made it when.... :)

Superb when a gay Scotsman is accused of being homophobic and needing to 'try' Scotsmen as they are more butch, and nearly (but only nearly), as good as what happened to me about this time last year. Oh, I'm not supposed to mention that am I? Ah well... I cared then. I don't now. It's time someone stood up to the agent provocateur's inappropriate behaviour. We've tried ignoring, and it doesn't work. So now let's mention it.

And, it does make me realise why some people continually have the problems with the world that they do. Cue usual north-of-the-border ranting, clever semantics, and eventual hissy fit I suspect... ;)

*sighs* Just how many times do we have to endure this sort of unnecessary unpleasantness?

Legal Value Witch

Many household insurance policies now include legal advice (either as standard or as an optional extra).

However, a new service that may help those who don't have this cover has just been launched by the Legal Services Commission: 'Community Legal Service Direct'. There is a national telephone advice service open between 9.00am and 5.00pm Monday to Friday, offering legal advice on debt, housing, education, and welfare benefits.

The service provides 30 minutes of free legal advice to everyone.

Those who have a legal case that are eligible for legal help or full legal aid will be provided with further free legal support. Those that are not eligible for legal help or legal aid can gain further legal support on a private client basis, if they choose, or can be advised of an organisation that may be able to advise or support them further.

Further information about the service is here.

Discrimination

Old School Friend BW is coming down south this week, with her 6 year old. I've not seen them for maybe 4 years now.

Yesterday I rang her to confirm the final arrangements for meeting up at the beginning of next week.

"Say hello to Blue Witch, Small," said Old School Friend BW, "we're going to see her next week."

"Whose mummy is she?" asked Small.

"Blue Witch doesn't have children, Small," replied Old School Friend BW.

"Then I'm not talking to her, so there!" said Small haughtily.

That's one thing that I find most puzzling about the childed set.
They appear to dispossess their own names.

The number of times the parent of a child I'm working with rings me and says, "Hello Mrs Blue Witch, it's Jenny's Mummy", or "Jonathan's Daddy," or whoever. Why don't they just say, "It's Kathryn Harris, Jenny's mother," rather than just, "It's Jenny's mummy"?

I'm not going to speculate on this one.
Don't want to be offensive :)

Thought for the day

I'd like to live as a poor man with lots of money.

- Pablo Picasso

Busy Bees and BWs

Bit busy today.
Beekeepers' annual meeting at The Coven later on.
Lots to do.
And the 'patience with ageing, deaf, infirm and otherwise annoying people' chip to insert...

The 61st Make Blue Witch Laugh Award

This week there are 5 contenders.

But not until later as I've not coded the file of snippets as I went along this week, and I first need to sort out the special labels for 150 jars of honey that an acquaintance wants for her wedding next week (beats sugared almonds in silly net bags doesn't it? :)) Pink roses, I need pink roses and all I can find in a suitable shape is peach ones...

Later: That took rather longer than planned. Total incompatibility of file formats between the label program and Photoshop, at least with my limited level of skill. I'm still not happy with the result, but, it's as good as it's getting, and Mr BW says it's OK.

Contender 1: Alan:

Pimping for GMail

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

I've got two more gmail invitations. I will give them away by midnight tomorrow night.

If you, dear reader, are interested in obtaining one of these, then there is a simple process to go through. Find a photograph of yourself and send it to "oddverse at gmail.com" On Wednesday evening, I will sift through any photographs that I have received and judge them against a range of criteria which I will not disclose. The two winners will be rewarded with gmail invitiations.
Typical criteria might include "braveness", "shagability", "artisticness of pose", "blatantly fake" and so on.

All pictures should be legal within Irish law. No pictures of porn-stars - I will know. Photographs will not be published or transferred to third parties. Winners will be informed by e-mail. Winners names will not be published. The judges decision is final. Multiple entries are permitted, although all pictures must be of the sender. Other sources of gmail invitations are available. Virtually everywhere.

Fortunately I still cannot see the need/use for gmail, any more than I can understand the need/use for instant messaging, so I didn't need to enter. Unsurprisingly, the invites proved nearly as difficult to give away as those tickets for the Olympic Torch Concert. Although Alan claims to have had one entry. Hmmm :)

Contender 2: Ruth (who recently admitted that she set up a blog, managed one post, then deleted it), commenting at Pob's:

I don't know - first we're e-less, now Pobless - and BW is being distracted from blogworld by real life. No sign of Elsie and Mr Piggy's blog has proved decidedly non-worksafe...

At this rate I'm going to have to do some work!

Ruth | Email | Homepage | 07.20.04 - 1:04 pm | #

Contender 3: drD at Alan's, in response to a picture showing that "a London Police Box has been spotted on the streets of Cardiff":

Comment #2

are those orange things dalek eggs?

Posted by drD, July 22, 2004 07:11 PM

Contender 4: billy:

although, I fight the description of optimist or pessimist, as it says in my profile: the glass ain't half full, it ain't half empty, I ordered a cheeseburger...

Contender 5: drD again. This time commenting in repsonse to DG's post on the reasons why people blog:

My only motivation is to achieve global domination with my reasoned and thoroughly sensible approach to life and to make my puppy love me.

drD | Email | Homepage | 07.22.04 - 8:40 pm | #

Winner coming later, when I've decided, and when Mr & Mrs Getting Married Next Weekend have been round and told me they hate the honey label design. Optimist, moi? ;)

7pm: Well, 2 hours later and a trip to a boutique fabric shop for lid material, during which I decided that getting some black and white tamper tags would be much easier and cheaper for them... The labels are now fabulous, the jars look fantastic, we're £400 better off... And the winner is billy. Because, despite his attempted honesty in the comments below, the nasty man who upset me on Thursday (yep, that's still bugging me) was really into these binary choice things, masquerading them as psychometric tests, which they weren't, and it seems right, somehow.

Passion, flower

Surely the maddest, most surreal plant species easily grown in this country?

6" green and knobbly

In addition to raspberries, tayberries, loganberries, blackcurrants, strawberries, plums, Beauty of Bath apples, carrots, radishes, lettuces, spring onions, beetroot, courgettes, rocket, garlic, runner beans, French beans, and probably some things I've forgotten, we now have cucumbers.

Lots of them.

Most useful.

Thought for the day

One comes, finally, to believe whatever one repeats to one's self, whether the statement is true or false.

- Napoleon Hill

Confusion

There's one thing that always annoys me (that's a lie actually, there are lots of things that annoy me, but most of them stem from this one thing) and that is egotists. Bad grammar that, probably, but I think of them as an 'it' cluster. 'It' = 'avoid like the plague'.

Today I had the misfortune of spending an hour and forty minutes in the company of one. His ego was only slightly smaller than his 20-odd stone bulk.

Yesterday I was approached by a local firm of, let's say, 'occupational consultants' seeking someone (from an allied but not identical branch of the discipline) to work with them to develop a new test of, let's say, certain 'people characteristics' for a particular specialist, and lucrative, business market. Right up my street I thought. I quickly set aside my plans for the summer (having a huge clear out of 16 years of work-related papers kept just in case, and doing the spot of high-level thinking/research/writing that I mentioned last week) and arranged to meet up with them this morning.

I can't put my finger on what I disliked about the MD of the company. He just made me feel hugely, hugely uncomfortable. He was pleasant, intelligent, very well qualified, read and published in his field. We shared a lot of beliefs and values. I know that, but he doesn't, because he was so busy talking himself, and his ideas, up, that he forgot to ask me anything, and he wasn't really listening to what I was saying when I did get a word in edgeways. He didn't enquire whether I had the skills or knowledge essential to the project, but just assumed that I had.

In my characteristic way, I kept interrupting with challenges, or comments, or questions, which he had a canny knack of avoiding. Those who know me will understand that it's quite hard to side-track me from something I want to know. But he managed it, somehow, and, short of being extremely rude, which is a depth to which I refuse to sink, I was totally powerless to do anything in the situation.

At the end of our discussions, he almost squeezed the bones in my hand into permanent deformity and said, "I like you. I like your style. You're quick on the uptake and you're honest. And I'm looking forward to working with you on this project."

I've just sent him an email telling him that, having given it careful thought, I'm unable to work with them on this project. I didn't have the courage to tell him at the time. And I'm cross with myself for that. And for sending a sugar-coated email rather than saying what I really wanted to, which was, "You are loud, overbearing, and big-headed. You have sub-zero people skills, I couldn't bear to be in the same room as you ever again, let alone work with you over several months, and you need to go on a diet." That last phrase because it's the only thing he can't challenge as being just my opinion, and it's the one little bit of power I can exert in this situation.

I don't like people who make me feel bad.
Particularly when I can't fathom out why or how they've made me feel like that. Or how I could act differently to prevent it happening again in a similar situation.

And I don't know why I sat there for an hour and forty minutes.

This sort of thing just doesn't happen to me.
Except that it just did.

Change of career?

Let two clicks of the mouse determine your future.

I'm either going to be an 'office numpty' (Blue Witch) or an 'astrologer' (non-Witch name). Or, if I put in BW, "Your ideal job is a Between the hours of 12 and 1pm on days with a W in them." I'll take the latter then. Thanks.

Mr BW is going to be a 'stunt person' or an 'evil boss'. He can make his own comment on that :)

(link borrowed from Pat)

Nice Ladies' BBQ

Nice Lady: "What's that BW?"

Me: "Thaaat (pause) is my 'cauldron'."

Nice Lady: "How does it work?"

Me: "It works on ultrasound - 5 vibrating heads in that floating unit split the water molecules and create dry 'steam' - with no heat."

Nice Lady: "Hmmm. But what's it for?"

(the story of the cauldron is here - 7th May post entitled 'Wednesday' if the link's 'jumping' for you as it is for me)

Well, they all got fed, watered, and went home happy.
It didn't rain.
In fact there was a quite nice sunset.
I was cross because the D'Oves refused to go back to their D'OveCote while The Grounds were full of Nice Ladies, so they went to bed late and are grouchy this morning.

The fact that I now have over 200 each of knives, forks and spoons to look through to find the few pieces of our cutlery that got muddled up when they were washing up and I wasn't supervising, and about 2 hours worth of driving round the neighbourhood to deliver left-behind things back to their rightful owners is annoying but not cataclysmic.

Thought for the day

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.

- Antoine de St. Exupery

Nearly ready

The trouble with doing Summer Events for the Nice Ladies is that they fuss.

My phone has been red hot this morning.

"Blue Witch, is it going to rain tonight?"
- "I don't know. What do you think I am, psychic?"
Ah... yes... guess I asked for that one...

"Blue Witch, have you remembered to get the disposable plates and bowls?"
- "Have I ever forgotten to do something I've promised?"

"Blue Witch, do you know who is meant to be getting the drinks for tonight?"
- "Erm, no, but last time whoever it was forgot, two years ago, I just opened my larder door and there was enough for 50, with some over, if you remember. I can do that again if needs be."
(*thinks* and I emptied out, cleaned and sorted the larder last night, just in case it needed opening, as it was a state and I didn't want you all seeing that :))

"Blue Witch, will it be OK if I assemble the puddings I've done in your kitchen?"
- "That would be a much better plan than doing them in the driveway dear."

"Blue Witch, did you get the cutlery out of the cupboard in the meeting hall last week?"
- "I did. The prospect of otherwise eating coleslaw with my fingers helped me to remember."

"Blue Witch, what's going to happen if it rains?"
- "Erm, we'll get wet, I imagine!"

"Blue Witch, I've just been talking to Pudding-Making-Lady and she thought you sounded a little, erm, tense. Is everything OK?"
- "I am absolutely fine. If only you'd all stop ringing me, I'd be even better."

This is the fourth year we've done this event. It is usually the second large event of the summer, but this year it's the first. Having been away all weekend, and with the awful weather of late, it has been a bit of a rush to get everything out, ready, cleaned up, filled up, set up, deheaded, trimmed and pruned, but, it's all perfect now (thank you Mr BW, you're a star). Just need to go into town to persuade the Market Vegetable Man that he'd like to pick 50 large potatoes out of his potato heap for me, get them scrubbed and into the Aga.

And then I'm going to be sitting down and relaxing for a couple of hours. With the phone unplugged.

Thought for the day

Better be alone than in bad company.

- Thomas Fuller

Clothes

Yesterday I spent the whole afternoon wandering about the town with my t-shirt on inside out after I'd been swimming at lunchtime. It took an 11 year old (that I know well) to point it out to me.

I've just nearly gone out of the door with my joggers on inside out.

I've been tinkering with my dress (sorry Alan). Always an error (sorry Alan). If anyone spots anything that's not working or is looking odd in a particular browser, please shout (sorry Alan).

A summer tail

This is what happened on The Coven Lawn at about 10pm last night.

Still dashing around trying to get everything ship-shape for the invasion of around 50 Nice Ladies tomorrow evening... so you'll have to write your own version...

Thought for the day

The world is a wheel always turning. Those who are high go down low, and those who've been low go up higher.

- Anzia Yezierska

Up a Tower

Absolutely no time for absolutely anything and everything at the moment.

It's panic stations at The Coven.

Thought for the day

Start by doing what's necessary, then what's possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.

- Francis of Assisi

Friendly gatherings

That's it, never again.
I really can't cope with travelling at the weekends.

4 hours it took us to do the 140 miles to Lymington yesterday (thunderstorms and accidents) and nearly 3 to get home again today (weight of traffic). Some of the people on the motorways at weekends really shouldn't be driving. Lane discipline just doesn't exist. But, I do love it when people think they're above sitting in traffic jams with everyone else and decide to use the hard shoulder, only to find a police car up ahead.

House party in a gorgeous place in the New Forest - swimming in the pool, walking on the beach, and indoctrinating yet more Witchy Pursuits Practitioners. Mr BW thoroughly enjoyed being the only boy among 8 women and a 6 month old baby. Particularly when conversation turned to 'how many CDs can you stack on your nipples?' (I'd never thought of trying that before, either...)

And I think that probably gives you some sort of measure of the tone of the weekend...

I gave up and went to bed at 1.30am last night. Mr BW and 3 others stayed up until 3.30am. They were all fine today, whereas I feel like death defrosted, but not much. Time for an early night methinks.

The 60th Make Blue Witch Laugh Award

Diamond Anniversary today :)

Contenders 1 & 2: At e's sadly deserted dwelling, shortly after she popped in to give us a quick update on her travels:

I've been missing you. I've been worried so much I've lost nearly 2 ounces.
Pob | Email | Homepage | 11.07.04 - 6:47 pm | #

Yeah. Me too! I've mislaid a gram.
Elsie Without Portfolio | Email | Homepage | 12.07.04 - 11:39 am | #

Contender 3: dave (Wednesday 14th post - where's your permalinks gone again dave?), who was talking about his new yahoo gay scooters group. Then came the comments:

want to join the club!

(But am not gay nor have vespa)
Elsie without Portfolio | Email | Homepage | 07.14.04 - 5:36 pm | #

Do you get gay scooters then? Are they the pink ones?

You don't want to go to Mersea. Really.

I'll take Elsie on the back of my bike. That should make it go about as well as a scooter.

*hurriedly flies off* :)
Blue Witch | Email | Homepage | 07.14.04 - 6:22 pm | #

"oh look everyone! two lesbians have arrived on a motorcycle! hurrah! someone get them two pints of bitter and a tena lady each."

seriously though, could anything be gayer than the classic vespa?
dave | Homepage | 07.14.04 - 11:59 pm | #

Contender 4: Vaughan, talking about the trials and tribulations of his delayed birth:

Another difference in my life, had my date of birth been as expected, would have been my star sign. I would have been Cancer, pure and simple. As it is, 23 July makes me possibly a Cancer, possibly a Leo. It all depends on whether you favour Russell Grant or Mystic Meg, I suppose. Whenever anyone asks which astrological prediction they should read out loud to me from the newspaper, I always take great pleasure in accentuating the sibilance as I explain that "I'm on the cusp, dear". And then, after they have fixed me with a distinctly unimpressed stare, I ask them to read Leo. I like lions, I don't like crabs - it's as simple as that.

The Trophy Winners this week are Pob and Elsie.

Delayed explanation

Life got in the way of an explanation for yesterday's contortion experiment.

Viz:

- One ill Welsummer hen last night (yellow plops, listless and comb-fallen: internet says fowl cholera, I didn't believe it as we haven't had an ill hen in 7 years (she's 6) and the 7 others were fine, so segregated her into a cat box, fed her water with a drop of cider vinegar, crushed sage leaves and raw garlic (all good tonics for humans), did a spell, and she seems much better today; probably just old).

- One ill PC - the jury are still out on that, but Little Computer Man's remotely set-up test took over half an hour to run when I had to re-boot the machine just now, and it's crashing all over the place, so presumably it found someting useful... if I go quiet you'll know why... but he'll be along on Monday to sort it all out, hopefully.

- One trip to Das Kapital - (bloggable) highlight of the day, me shouting at 3 teenage lads for fishing coins out of a fountain while everyone else said how terrible it was to each other, but did nothing. As I was looking at the coins in the water and estimating their total worth, I suddenly was struck by a thought - what had people been wishing for as they threw their change into the water? (reminds me of a Dean Friedman song that - "she was looking for change, and so was I").

So - back to the fold arms, fold hands...

I'm afraid it's another one from those Swiss researchers who annoyed us last time... (but who have received a great deal of post-publication academic acclaim and support).

That study found that most of us, being right handed, concentrate dopamine (a neuorotransmitter) more in the right hemisphere of our brains (we spin away from that side) - and vice versa for left handers. We also mis-judge the midline of our bodies, slightly to the non-dominant side, due to that as well. If you don't have this "normal" one-sided distribution of dopamine it can cause an array of schizophrenia related problems.

Researchers in Switzerland have found another way to check for this.

The arm/hand folding test.

Most people match (that is, left arm on top, left thumb on top or
right arm on top, right thumb on top - handedness is irrelevant in this, they say).

The researchers found that in people who have incongruous preferences, it was an indication of an irregular dopamine distribution which could lead to some personality difficulties.

As I said before, don't take this too seriously :)

Particularly as Mr BW found he doesn't match, whereas I do.
And if there's one of us who is ever so faintly barking, it's me (and no, save yourself the effort of typing the obvious comment to that, please ;))

And if you don't like the finding, then maybe you folded your hands differently to normal when you did the test after all? :)

Thought for the day

Expectations are resentments under construction.

- Anne Lamott

Another experiment

More of this handedness/brainedness stuff.

Because I've decided to take my interest to a different level and do something constructive. Like write an academic paper. Haven't had anything published for ages and it's time I stopped being a Lazy Witch and made another useful contribution to the educational world. Don't worry, you're not my research subjects, I'm just coming across little gems as I'm hunting around for info, and sharing them.

Fold your arms.
Undo them and now fold your hands.
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Did you match?
Left arm on top, left thumb on top?
Or right arm on top, right thumb on top?
Or not?

Thought for the day

Following the path of least resistance is what makes rivers and everyone crooked.

- Unknown (from yesterday's calendar page - it just seemed appropriate)

The Butler Report

No, I've got nothing to say, except I told you so.

I also know that if *I* had been involved in the collection or collation of the original 'intelligence' and could see that it had all been put together so tragically incorrectly, then, whether or not I thought my job/carreer would be at risk, and even understanding the ramifications of the Official Secrets Act (which I have had to sign on several occasions in the past), I'd jolly well do something about it.
A spell or something.

And I am absolutely horrified, just talking to people I know, and reading out and about in blogland, by how many people have been surprised by the contents of Farenheit 9/11.

Yes, I'm a Simplistic Witch.

A bit like John Kerry, US Election Hopeful, who said on BBC Breakfast that America should only go to war because it has to, not because it wants to.

But, he is trying to be the next Mr World.
Whereas I'm just trying to plead for a little more 'love and understanding' in the world.

Wednesday question

Here's my latest 'daft things to do in the office to amuse your colleagues' (look, I didn't say 'co-workers, aren't I English? :)) thingy.

Place your palms together and interweave your fingers (so that you get right little finger, left little finger, next to each other, then, right ring finger, left ring finger next to each other etc) (who can come up with a way to explain that rather better?). Now keeping your hands locked together, and palms facing up, in front of you, can you step through your arms with your feet?

Opportunity

In the course of a week I get lots of mail about things in which the sendees (it should exist, that word) hope I may have a professional interest.

Yesterday I received a letter asking me whether I would be interested in renting 'a treatment room in Soho' on Mondays or Wednesdays. £100 a day (they stress that is for 'unlimited usage'). 'It is small, quiet and sensitively furnished with a hydraulic couch.' And there's reception cover.

Not at all useful for my current professional interests.

However, I'm always looking to branch out.
Anyone interested in a business partnership? ;)
All proposals will be considered...

Thought for the day

A big shot is just a little shot who kept on shooting.

- Zig Ziglar

Could do better...

This time of year I still have occasional nightmares about 2 things.

One is not having done enough work for my finals (20 years ago now), and the other is not having written all my reports on time (and it's 16 years since I was last a class teacher wading through constructing nearly 40 sets of made up stories with the aim of being as minimally offensive as possible, because, after all, the little sods who spent a year driving me up the wall were someone's offspring and they probably quite liked them).

By comparison with my days of school report writing (all had to be written by hand, in permanent ink), teachers of today have it easy. Word processors, banks of cut-and-paste phrases, and National Curriculum objectives to copy to pad-out the page, hadn't been invented then.

There is absolutely no excuse for reports to go out to parents with some of the howlers I have seen in the past few days. I think parents have a perfect right to be indignant when they find another child's name in their child's report (what's 'find and replace' for, for goodness sake?).

However, I can not believe this phrase that I have just seen:

Target: To read through his work o check it makes sense and that he hasn't missed out any words.

Green leaves

Star signs

I've got one last thing to finish off then I am work-free until 3rd August. I could have finished the task a couple of weeks ago, but, for some reason, I decided to prolong the agony and leave it hanging.

So, while I'm doing it, I'll leave you with an astrological link via Bushra for your entertainment. I think it's pretty spot on. The best I've seen on the net actually (and they don't want an email address to spam you for the rest of eternity either).

Sun in Sagittarius, Moon in Virgo

This astrological combination gives you excellent powers of discrimination. The gifts of intuition and articulateness will aid you in solving problems, along with a capacity to foresee intellectually concerning material things. You are minutely analytical and can fulfill any task that requires meticulous attention to detail. You take pleasure in serving others, bringing to any task your native industriousness. In matters of love you are not likely to get swept off your feet. Your thoughts hold more sway over your actions than do your feelings. You may be too easily irritated or despondent, exasperating friends and family with exacting demands and finicky attitudes. Yet you make equally harsh demands of yourself as you do of others. The key to a more harmonious self lies in relaxing your faultfinding tendencies.

Why's Mr BW giggling quietly in the corner? ;)

And, it's always amazed me that they don't put birth times on birth certificates, because it makes an enormous difference with things astrological. If you don't know your time of birth, convention says to use 12 noon. However, if you do know, and you compare your result with that for 12 noon, it can be quite different. Try it and see!

Thought for the day

Don't mess with Witches :)

Colour me beautiful

I'm getting worried.

The local swimming pool, from whence I am just returned, is repainting and retiling. Since last week the flume, the doors, a proportion of the tiles round the aquacise pool, and one of the canoes, have all been replaced or repainted.

In BW blue. The exact shade.

Why do older women all wear black swimsuits? Black suits hardly anyone. Me, I've got a **** one :)

Question

Mr BW and I spent 26 minutes walking within a 35 metre diameter here on Saturday. What were we doing?

Thought for the day

Those who write clearly have readers, those who write obscurely have commentators.

- Albert Camus

Eye update

Having missed the duty chemists (we were too busy fighting nature doing things in The Coven Grounds and forgot the time), I then had an inspiration and remembered that there was a pharmacy in a local Tesco's. I refuse to go in Tesco's (because I dislike the staff's attitude to customers), unless it suits me. And then I send Mr BW. So I got some Brolene eye drops for my eye problem.

It says not to use them with contact lenses. Which presumably must be because they get absorbed into the lens material and do it damage. So I can only conclude that whatever it is in the drops will get absorbed into the silicone band that holds my left eye together* (along with a couple of hundred stitches) and do harm to that.

I am therefore concerned that by tomorrow morning there will be bits of band and dissolved stitches on my pillow.

* (For those who don't know, I had a detached retina almost 4 years ago and now have a 'distingushing mark' to put on my passport - 'band round left eye' (if you ever meet me I'll let you feel it if you ask nicely ;))

Time warp?

The calendar says it's July 11th.
My head thinks it's 11th July.

But, either something has gone mightily wrong with 'time', or someone has failed to tell The Weather God to pull the lever to change the season.

Usually at this time of year we are eating outside every day. However, I'm sure I could count on my fingers (not including my thumbs) how many evenings we've managed it so far this 'summer'.

It's more like September at dawn and dusk, the rain's like a bad April, and yesterday I heard a cuckoo again.

Bizarre.

Aye, eye

I seem to have a minor infection in the inner corner of my lower left eyelid. Could be in the tear duct as it's a bit swollen. I've had it before, and it seems to happen the day after I change my contact lenses (which are monthly disposables - as, sadly, they don't make my prescription in daily disposables).

I'm absolutely fastidious about lens hygiene, so I never quite manage to work out why this happens.

Anyway, my choice of 'cure' this evening is Optrex liquid (which I've been trying all day, and which hasn't done anything so far), cats' eye ointment which is in date, or Brolene ointment which is opened and 7 years and 5 months past its expiry date (February 1997 isn't that long ago, surely?).

Hmmm.... as the nearest duty chemist is a 20 mile round trip and doesn't open for another 13 hours, I'm going with the old Brolene. Anyone know where you can get glass blue eyes, just in case? :)

The 59th Make Blue Witch Laugh Award

I've just been inspecting The Coven Trophy Cupboard. There are plenty of Blue Stars, the MBWLA Trophy has been returned in readiness for today after spending last week in Mr Piggy's Sty (it was a bit traumatised, but I've given it a good rub and it seems OK now). But, where's the Alternative Trophy? The one that's only needed to be bestowed on 2 previous occasions? The "Blue Witch Sadly Laughed at Me" one. It's missing! Just as well, because it would otherwise have had to be awarded again this week...

This week there are 2 contenders.

Contender 1: Pob:

I've been extremely busy. Apparently there's another world out there, what some people misguidedly refer to as The Real World. It's similar to the Blogosphere in many ways, although nowhere near as much fun and the people are taller.

Contender 2: dave's comment to my tie post yesterday:

i can do a windsor and tie a dickie. my dad is a mason so i can also polish the silver ball-smacking thing that hangs from their skirts. he didn't speak to me for a week when i ridiculed his offer of a nomination to join. i had a cravat wearing phase when i was seven and also sported the inspirational haircut made famouse by the ramones 4 years later. paige boy i think it's called. i was given 20p to go to sunday school at 9am every week. i worked out that this was the morning for my parents weekly sex. i made a fuss and upped the stakes to 30p and bought sweets and the news of the world and sat in my grans sitting room while she slow roasted a joint of beef for 9 years.

The winner this week is dave, for the lovely cameo of the scene in his gran's front room on a Sunday when 'e were a lad :)

Endowment complaints

Just to update my 11th June post... today we heard that another of our endowment mis-selling complaints has been upheld.

If you have endowments that you believe were mis-sold, complain now, before it's too late (see previous post for links). We've had £18K of compensation already, and we're still awaiting the outcome of the last.

Aquatics Direct: WARNING

FOR TRULY APPALLING CUSTOMER SERVICE, BUY FROM (www.aquatics-direct.co.uk) AQUATICS DIRECT.

The worst customer service I have had this month - actually, probably this year. I'll add the full story later on. Just wanted to get this into the system so that Google could start warning people asap not to buy from Aquatics Direct (www.aquatics-direct.co.uk).

(The woman on the phone laughed at me when I told her I'd do this. No-one laughs nastily at BW and gets away with it ;))

Later: The story goes like this:

Beginning of the week: Ring up for advice, purchase what is suggested to me, and another item that I wouldn't have purchased had I not been buying the first item. Pay for 48 hour delivery. Am promised delivery on Wednesday.

Thursday 5pm: Parcel arrives. Only one of the 2 items ordered is enclosed and it is badly damaged (although this is not visible until I open the parcel). Nothing on the invoice says anything about the other (main) item I ordered.

Thursday 5.15pm: Ring up. They are meant to close at 6pm but answerphone message saying the office is now shut is already on. As the message offers to ring back if I leave a number, I do.

Friday 10.30am: Having heard nothing, I ring again. A very offhand woman tells me that the item I ordered is discontinued so I won't be receiving it. I politely point out that it was an item suggested to me for my requirements, so why was it sold to me? I also calmly point out that it would have been nice to have been informed of this fact, and to have had at least some sort of an apology from her for my inconvenience. Additionally, I point out that I would not have ordered the damaged item had I not been able to have the other item (as the postage charge was almost half the single item cost). She then decides that the item has now been reinstated, but refuses to send it free on a next day delivery (that would still arrive 3 days after the original item I paid for should have). After 7 minutes on hold (on an 0870 number) she tells me that they will agree to post the item, rather than courier it, so I might get it tomorrow. However, they are not prepared to do anything about the damaged item unless I return it to them at my expense, and that, if I do return it at my expense, they will not refund my postage. I ask whether I can have a refund of my original postage charge as the item was damaged and I did not get the 48 hour delivery I paid for (Parcel Farce's fault, so they can presumably claim against Parcel Farce). She says that she thinks I have a cheek as she has "already bent over backwards to help you"!!! At this point I ask her whether she would like some publicity on the internet for her company's complete lack of respect for customers, customer service, customers' legal rights regarding damaged goods, and for services paid for and not received, and she laughs at me.

I did warn her...

And, of course, I'm not expecting to see the missing item tomorrow either. If and when it turns up, I will, of course, let you know.

Saturday morning update: Did the pump arrive? Of course it didn't. I'm not expecting to see it on Monday either.

Monday 3pm: I went out at noon. On returning home I found a parcel on my doorstep. Yes, contrary to our expectations, it is the missing item. I have no way of telling when it was sent, although there is a note on the invoice that says, "09/07/2004 10.34pm: Must leave today without fail on a 1st class service to arrive Sat." (my bold). If indeed it was pm rather than am, it was never going to get here on Saturday, was it? If only they'd been prepared to pay a couple of pounds extra for a Special Delivery Service that would have guaranteed Saturday delivery as I requested (not unreasonable given all the circumstances I think), they wouldn't now be Googling 9th for their company name, and Mr BW wouldn't now have to spend several evenings doing what he could have done in one step at the weekend, had the item got here when it should have. Given the history, I do feel that they could have omitted the standard line from the despatch note, "Thank you for placing your order with Aquatics Direct. We hope you received an excellent service, and that you will be happy to order from us again." I'll leave you to draw your own conclusions on whether I will or not...

Incidentally, this is the second time I have had problems wih this company (and yes, I probably shouldn't have given them a second chance, but...). Last time (around 2 years ago) it was an incorrectly picked order and damaged items. It took me 6 phone calls to sort that out. And they had the same 'couldn't care less' attitude then too.

It works, doesn't it? :)

Tying the knot

You know that mangle in the Big Bother garden? Well, I've got one just like it.

Talking of BB, aren't their school uniforms messy? If *I* was the Head of the BB School, they'd all be in detention. Looking at their ties reminded me of something I was reading on Men's Fashion, from Alan's link rack, last week. From that I found a link to this article on knotting ties.

I've never had to wear a school tie, so tying them is a skill I've never mastered. In fact, until I read that article, I don't think I consciously registered that there was more than one way of doing it.

So, my question is, can you tie a tie? And, if so, what is your favoured method? (The answer isn't 'around my neck' either. The choice appears to be four-in-hand, Windsor, cross knot, half-Windsor, Prince Albert, Ascot, or small knot.)

Thought for the day

It is clear the future holds opportunities - it also holds pitfalls. The trick will be to seize the opportunities, avoid the pitfalls, and get back home by 6:00.

- Woody Allen

Characters

Discussion in the comments box below has got me thinking - who would you most like to play you if the story of your life was ever made?

Me, I'd like Amanda Burton.

Or Meryl Streep, as Ruth suggested, strangely. As long as my neck doesn't have to rotate. That was first film that Mr BW and I saw at the cinema together. It still gives me the willies that.

Help!

Can anyone reading who has Oddverse Alan's mobile number please email me urgently? I need to get a message from someone else about his travel arrangements this evening to him.

The message can be emailed back to you for onward transmission, I don't need the number myself. Ta.

This was a public service announcement on behalf of someone else :)

Update: All solved, thanks to all concerned. The Power of T'Internet :)

Local blogger makes News

Our very own NiC gets published (3rd photo down) :)
(And no, it's not another Mr Piggy special, this one's for real and follows on from NiC's post here).

Well done NiC!

And... Mr BW has just been on the phone from Montréal. Looks like e did create some havoc before she left town... Apparently the whole city's water supply is currently undrinkable, and they are having to use bottled water for everything. However, the hotel he's staying in is trying to charge people for the bottled water they're using as directed. I think not (even when it's not our money, Mr BW won't forsake our principles).

Oh, it's ages since I posted a quiz-y thing, isn't it?

Back into new blogger mode today as I've no time to sort out what I'd planned to do this week (the energy posts) after losing 15 hours yesterday through having no power.

All I'll say is that Tic-Tacs are, in my experience, responsible for more hyperactivity in children than almost any other sweet...

You are Spearmint.
You are quick-witted and sharp. You pay close
attention to details and you can tell what your
friends are feeling. You are always the first
to understand a joke and you are valued for
your insight and advice. However, you
sometimes isolate yourself from other people,
afraid to share your own feelings.

Most Compatible With: Cinnamon


Which Tic-Tac Flavor Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla (Link nicked from Rob.)

Who's cinammon? What do they do? I need to know.

Thought for the day

Happiness consists of a solid faith, good health, and a bad memory.

- Clare Boothe Luce

The Power of Witch

After the last session of the Nice Ladies Witchcraft Course last night, there were some very weird local power outages. Only The Coven plus 5 other properties were affected.

The Power went off totally here at 8:07am this morning and came back on at 22.55pm. 14 hours and 48 minutes without power because the electricity supply company couldn't find out what was wrong.

I have a feeling that I know...

But I am bloody pissed off that I've lost a whole day's work (it's impossible to do anything without electricity, and it was too dark here to read well before 7pm due to the foul rain), my sturgeon has died and I've had no cups of tea all day.

Tomorrow morning bright and early I have the BT engineer coming round to attempt to sort out the fault on my phone line that has knocked my modem speed down to 34,000bps. Then I'm off to investigate generators. In the past 2 weeks the supply here has been off 4 times for a total of over 24 hours. Do they care? No. Do I get compensation? No. Do I get a generator so they don't have any future control over my life? Yes.

Direction

Sharpening pencils is so therapeutic. I don't seem to use a pencil much, but my pencils in my pencil pot are always blunt. I've got one of those battery-operated pencil sharpeners. Push in, allow to whirr, remove, repeat until job done. Excellent.

Talking of battery-operated things, as I wasn't, but others were, I've just realised that I forgot to reveal what it was that I bought last week that I hadn't bought for 23 years.

It was a new A-Z.

The old one, that I bought when I went to university, had, quite literally, fallen apart. But, I'm not happy with the new one. A bookstore operative told me that, in common with most map books, they are now only made with spiral binding, so, reluctantly, I bought that format. Later the same day in here, I saw normal book ones. Spiral bound maps are dreadful. Either the pages pull through the wires or the spiral unravels from the covers. Bet this one doesn't last another 23 years...

Multi-lingual keyboard practice

Just posting these so I don't lose them...

English: The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.
French: Portez un vieux whisky au juge blond qui fume.
German: Sylvia wagt quick den Jux bei Pforzheim.
Spanish: Queda gazpacho, fibra, látex, jamón, kiwi y viñas.

Speedy Witch

Getting nothing done fast here. It takes so long to do everything when Mr BW isn't here to do it all help.

I spent an hour wandering about the garden with a watering can, feeding my 'special diet' plants earlier. This one has seaweed extract, this one has citrus feed, this one has tomato feed... oh they're so fussy some of my children.

On the way round I devoured 3 carrots, 5 radishes, 4 clusters of blackcurrants, 3 pods of broad beans, 3 strawberries, 6 raspberries, 3 mange tout and some basil tips that needed pinching out. Better than lunch on a plate.

A long new section of dual carriageway quite near here finally opens at the end of the week. It has been lined, crash barriered and swept for over a week now. I have this desperate urge to go and have a blast down it after dark tonight. Well, actually, I've had this desperate urge since this time last week, but Mr BW was here to stop me until yesterday. I could easily get the bike through the bollards that are currently blocking it off.

I'm just a teensy bit worried that they may have security set up as I doubt I'm the only one who's had that idea. Sadly, I don't have an alternative bike number plate (although I do have 3 car ones - but I hasten to add that I've never used them since we got rid of the cars they went with). Maybe I could just take the numberplate off? I could undoubtedly out-ride any pursuing car, and they don't have motorcycle police in our county any more...

Hmmmm. Naughty Witch :)

Thought for the day

My grandfather once told me that there were two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was much less competition.

- Indira Gandhi

Hey, teacher...

I will defend to the last my view that self-esteem and emotional intelligence are central and essential pre-requisites for a happy and fulfilling life.

They should be the cornerstone of any educative process.

So many children these days are brought up in environments where these qualities are neither understood nor valued.

It therefore makes me very cross when I read things like this.

Without a positive sense of self everything else is ultimately a waste of time.

Ageism

Last week Good Friend BW and I decided that we would start going swimming again. She had a very nasty accident 16 months ago when her car (stationary at a junction) was hit and thrown into the air by a lorry, but, after several operations, she is now nearly as good as new again, and in need of some gentle exercise to get full mobility back in her arm.

We used to go to a swimming/aquarobics session on Monday afternoon, so we thought we'd just carry on with that (both of us detest group exercise classes, but the sort in water is just about OK as no-one can see what you're doing anyway). She's just telephoned to say that she rang the sports centre to check it was still on at the same time, and that it is, but it's now over 50s only.

We're still going - if I get refused for being eight and a half years too young, she's going to say that she's 20 years over the age, so she's giving 10 of her years to me.

We'll see how it goes... :)

Update: It was 50+s and the clinically obese (referred by GPs). And the girlie instructor was 5'4" and 14 or 15 stone. So unusual for me to be the thinnest, and fittest (in the old-fashioned sense of the word - actually, on second thoughts... ;)) person somewhere. Quite an eye-opener. Definintely good blog material though, so I shall go again next week.

Nasty people

Just taken Mr BW in to work as he's off to Montreal later to see how much damage e inflicted on the city in her year there, now that she's left on business.

I am so pleased that I don't work in an office, judging by the appalling driving skills and lack of courtesy shown by road users (who must work in offices) at that time in the morning. The 18.8 mile round trip took 63 minutes and, were I not going out again later, I'd need a stiff G&T now. These people are also the reason I/we don't go shopping in evenings or at weekends. Push, barge, I'm more important than you, get out of my way, it's your fault, no I'm not saying excuse me thank you or sorry, or acknowledging your presence. They just change the whole ethos of an out-of-house experience.

At least we don't have to live in close proximity to them.

Now, is it that working in offices makes them stressed and so they behave like this, or is it that they're always like this?

Thought for the day

If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made out of meat?

- Jo Brand

A Question of Transport

I am totally incensed this morning by reports in today's papers and on Breakfast News that Alistair Darling has in mind a little scheme to allow cars with more than one occupant to use special lanes on certain motorways.

So, mumsy with baby pottering about, or family going to the zoo for the day can potentially have an easier journey on a motorway than me, or someone else, using their car to get from a to b for work? There is no public transport round here (OK, I lie, 2 buses a day into the nearest market town if I walk a mile down narrow country lanes with no pavements and no speed limits, or a slightly better service I walk three miles). I have no choice.

And while I would like to offer lifts to local people I see standing about waiting for buses, or walking through lanes as it's their only option, I don't unless I know them, because of the potential risks. Maybe what needs to be given some thought is how schemes could be set up so that people wanting lifts and people offering lifts could identify each other? (maybe special windscreen stickers and photo-passes?).

Just because something happens in America does not make it a good idea Mr Darling. In fact...

Right, who knows where I can buy a blow-up doll to put on the passenger seat?

The 58th Make Blue Witch Laugh Award

....will be delayed as Mr BW can't be trusted to be left on his own.

To add to yesterday's dropped fish & chips in front of important customers at lunchtime, the broken cistern lid and the dousing of our cheese and black pepper muffins for breakfast with washing up water, he has not started the day well.

He actually put on 2 pairs of pants.

Later:

Which leaves Mr Piggy as the winner of this week's 2 points and The Trophy for his little gems about the Olympic Torch Concert last Saturday: the BBC News page here and report here.

Selected excerpts:

...the BBC film crew report that some spectators witnessed a gleaming blue broomstick erupting in a wizardy of sparks and flashes as it unceremoniously dumped its passenger in front of Sir Steve Redgrave...

It has been speculated that the woman, who has been named only as 'Blue Witch', unintentionally lost control of her flying device while distracted by the size of Princess Anne's arse.

The woman, from somewhere not of this earth, is a mother of at least two D'Oves and a number of stray gingerbread men.

The Flying Device, as newspapers puts it, was due to undergo scientific tests....Expert Dr Daftas Abrush is quoted as saying: "The similarities in appearance to a yard broom were truly remarkable. I think there was almost definitely some inter-dimensional aspect to its construction."

BBC Off-World Monitoring, based on the Mir Space Station and staffed entirely by volunteer Jelly Babies, selects and translates information from radio, television, press, news agencies and the Internet from 150 countries and 23 dimensions in more than 70,000 languages.

***********************

BW herself... was very clearly under the influence, having swallowed half a bottle of Co-Codamol ... on top of a bottle of cranberry vodka, to prepare for the event. At one point she fell over the barrier and lay all mini-skirted legs akimbo in front of Concrete Victoria mouthing silent obscenities and demanding another large vodka. Concrete Victoria said nothing, but the open-mouthed crowd was horrified. Mr BW, however, acted like a true knight and rescued his damsel quicker than we could mutter "Oh my", or the BBC film crew mutter "Camera 5 on the Flourescent blue NOW!''.

All through this, Steve wandered around looking for discarded cigarette ends and asking old ladies for the blank pages at the end of their Bibles to roll the tobacco in.

*SCREAMS VERY LOUDLY*

Bloody never-ending leaking lavs - now we have a broken cistern lid too. FUCK. Have already been onto a company that deals in obsolete parts and it's a cool £164.50 to replace it. FUCK. And no guarantee it'll fit into the panelling cut-out as it's the model after. FUCK. I can feel an insurance claim coming on... FUCK.

Looks like Marco will be able to go to Pride in London tomorrow now. Bet everyone'll be pleased to see him, he's been such a positive example after all :(

Back to mopping up now...

Nipon

I was just dropping off to sleep last night when Mr BW started telling me about the 2 Japanese visitors he has the delight of entertaining today.

"Must remember to wear a suit," he muttered over and over. Several years ago the company went into 'dress down every day' mode. This resulted in a situation where the higher up the management ladder you are, the more scruffily you dress at work. Except that when you have visitors, you're supposed to wear a suit. Something that I find quite hilarious. What must visitors think - a whole huge 1500-person site full of cardi- and fleece- and overall- clad people (dependent on age and function) and one person, the person in front of you, in a suit...

As they will be eating out tonight, Mr BW decided that they'd all have to settle for the staff canteen at lunchtime. "If I was visiting a Japanese company, I'd be very interested in seeing their staff canteen," I muttered sleepily. "Oh, and that'll be a good topic of conversation - you'll be able to explain all about the reason for fish and chips on Fridays won't you?"

"Erm... if I could remember it..." he said. My brain doesn't function well when it's about to fall into dream-land after a hard day in London. "It's something Christian," I mumbled. "I thought it was Jewish?" he countered.

"Oh just tell them it's traditional in all English works canteens in enlightened companies, that'll keep them happy," are the last words I remember uttering before I fell asleep...

Reasoning here and here... god knows how the chips got involved though...

Panorama

So, as Elsie correctly guessed (down a post), I spent yesterday afternoon at the top of New Zealand House on the corner of Haymarket and Pall Mall, just off Trafalgar Square. It's the taller-than-Nelson's-Column building in the background of the picture on the right-hand side. DG tells me that it's sometimes opened for the London Open House Weekend (there was me, hoping to make him jealous, but, he'd already been there, of course). Well worth a visit if you see it open. And it would be a fantastic place to have a party. Not that they'd ever allow it...

And the thing I haven't done for 23 years?

Now, where was I?

My legs ache so much this morning that I nearly couldn't climb the stairs to my Inner Coven. Two BW visits to London in one week. Something must be up in the world.

Apart from leaving the Blue Broomstick parked under a nasty sticky sappy tree in Epping (luckily dave's kind, sweet provision of another decidedly phallic object for Mr BW arrived just in time to make the required washing possible:)), and nearly getting knocked out several times by the recent proliferation of mobile placards advertising everything from restaurants to tanning shops to gyms to... (well, depending where one was of course), the day went well.

I did something I haven't done for 23 years.

And saw 3 broken down buses (two brand new on a 04 plate and one no more than 10 months old on a 53 plate - trust you'll be complaining Ken?)

And spent the afternoon supposedly as a presentation but in reality feasting my eyes on the best 360 degree uninterrupted panoramic view of the capital that I have ever seen.

Now then, who knows where I was?

Thought for the day

Worried about looking old?
You'll never again look as good as you do now.
[Botox and major surgery excepted]

- drD

Question

Next week I'm going to be doing a little series on energy.
Something I've become very interested in of late.
For all sorts of reasons that I probably won't go into as I don't want people thinking I'm weirder than they already think I am.
Not that I care, but...

I'm going to have to be a bit careful as I don't want this to Google, for all sorts of reasons, so some of it may end up in the hopefully-Google-proof comments boxes.

I have a preliminary question that I'd like you to answer for me.
It's not a trick question, I'd just really value your opinion, even if it's just to agree with a previous comment.

What do you understand by the term 'energy'?

Seen in an empty shop window in my local market town

Familiar Story

I needed a wee in the middle of the night. I'm getting old you see. And I'd probably had a tad too much red wine and a nice glass of vintage port rather too late in the evening (you have to get through BB somehow these days).

As I was stumbling from bed to loo in my shorter-sighted-than-a-bat way, something brushed against my legs. I screamed and Mr BW woke up, jumped out of bed, put the light on (no street lights where The Coven is) and rushed to my rescue.

Somehow the Ginger Familiar (who's not actually allowed further inside than the back door mat) had got locked in.

So, he let her out (didn't even tell her off, as he said was his fault, which I really didn't understand, given that she's not allowed inside anyway).

This morning I find that 2 clocks have stopped (battery operated ones) and the static hand on the barometer has broken.

Moral: dunno????

Thought for the day

Children begin by loving their parents.
After a time they judge them.
Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them.

- Oscar Wilde