Blue Witch

Friday questions

Where has the last week gone?

Where has the summer gone?
(Yes, it's official, this summer, of which today is the last day, has been the wettest since 1914, when records began - only 1956 has come anywhere close and I wasn't alive then. Summer was in April. But I think they should have removed this predicition page from 11th April from their website, don't you? "The latest seasonal forecast from the Met Office issued today, reveals that this summer is, yet again, likely to be warmer than normal... there are no indications of an increased risk of a particularly dry or particularly wet summer.")

What is the most unlikely activity you think I might engage in?
(Nectar have just provided a coupon with a 1000 bonus point gift if I join a Gala Bingo Club - which is probably a pretty fair contender...)

Thought for the day

Speed and noise. That's what's wrong with the world today.

- Elderly Neighbour BW, yesterday

Thought for the day

Somebody's boring me - I think it's me.

- Dylan Thomas

Another Guest Post from Mi1dred

Well, hello again my dears. It has been an exciting time since I last saw you.

I have been polished and fussed over with lots of new grease and oil and I know that box in the corner is full of new parts for me, but I cannot quite see what’s in it. Anyway I am rambling on, what was I saying, oh yes I remember, the weekend.

Well, the BWs were very busy over the weekend, with a visitor to help with honey extracting (I am not best pleased about my new home being taken over by lots of h0ney containers I must say), and then Mr BW went away for Saturday night, but when Monday came we went on a trip in the sunshine.

Well bless my rubber tyres if there weren’t another 21 of my relations there when we arrived at a localish country show.

We beat all those posh Rolls Royces who could only manage 5 of their family. All of my relations were different shapes and ages; I have to say that Charlie has put on a little weight but you cannot blame him, he is nearly 80, whilst Enid has been on a diet and was always built for speed so can now go twice as fast as me. And weren’t we all looking just tickedy boo in the sunshine?

I enjoyed all the humans my age, or a bit younger, gathering round and looking at me, and I could see them going off down memory lanes.

There were ice creams and cold beer all round and Mr BW spent lots of time talking to people who know lots about our more delicate bits so that he can better look after me in my old age. The BWs also found a junk stall with some bits and pieces for me.

Just as I thought we were getting ready to go home, as us old ladies need our rest and can only take so much excitement, we finished the day with a surprise drive around the arena and lined up in the middle so that everyone could see us before we ambled our way home.

All in all just a splendid day out.

Friday question

Your favourite place in the world?

(and why, but only if you want)

Misc.

I spent yesterday sewing a D'Ove. Of which more anon. My middle right finger is now very sore, as it was previously damaged by halving plums, which seem to be both early, and glutful this summer, erm, year.

I was alarmed to hear that half of the people also sewing D'Oves had put their central heating on already. That's the joy of an Aga. No need to put heating on for months yet. Even though lots of people think they're expensive to run, they're not, when you consider what they do for you. Even carbonifying plums - finally, that rogue unidentified picture, from a few days ago, got identified (almost) yesterday - they were accidentally left in the top - hot - oven for 14 hours. Well done to e. I'll bet that guess comes from experience :) The thing is, unless you sit on the roof next to where the flue exits, you cannot smell anything cooking, or burning, which is wonderful. Or not, if you're a plum.

And - a Value Tip - Boots are currently offering 6" x 4" photo prints (digital or film, normally 6p) on a 24 hour service for just 4p. Yes 4p. Until 11th September. If you take them in today, you can pick them up tomorrow, when they're doing triple points. Oh - and if you spend over £10 you get a £5 skincare voucher with which you can buy free skin wipes. Almost free then.

Also, while on the subject of Value Tips, while I was eating my cauliflower and cheese last night (Mr BW was away, I fancied cauliflower cheese, but couldn't be bothered to fiddle about making it, so boiled the lovely lime-green cauliflower with pointy florets (can't remember the variety, but it was very beautiful), and ate it with a fork in one hand and slices of cheese in the other hand, which was nearly cauliflower cheese - shall I write a cookery book of lazy person's recipes?) I accidentally saw a commercial break (are they still called that?). One of the adverts was for Aldi's Austin's.

We discovered this a few weeks ago, and I meant to mention this before, but forgot. It's a Pimm's-type drink that is less than a third of the full price of Pimms, at £4.99 for a 70cl bottle, and, in a blind testing, 2 out of 2 Very Discerning Witches Who Drink Pimm's All Summer Long (ie gallons of the stuff - well, OK, pints, we drink it in pints) preferred it. There is almost no taste difference at all - if anything the Austin's is slightly smoother, but the real bonus is that it doesn't go frothy when you pour in the lemonade, even if you try very hard to make it, to prove that it won't.

And you can always pour it into a used Pimm's bottle if you don't want everyone knowing what a good Value Person you are. That hint came from a Nice Lady who swore for years that she would never shop in Aldi - until I saw her in there one day - at which point she admitted I'd convinced her, but that she still decanted a lot of stuff into brand label jars and bottles as she was too embarrassed for her friends to know where she was shopped lest they thought she'd fallen on hard times. I suggested that she'd be better off changing her friends, but I don't think she understood my drift.

And finally, I was alarmed that, from the nil response to yesterday's question, no-one else seems to cut the used empty segments off blister packets of tablets. Why?

Update

Wasn't it windy in the night? I got almost no sleep after 2am. At one point I was convinced that a spell had gone horribly wrong and Hurricane Dean had rerouted. Now we have near-torrential rain. Good Friend BW's husband told me on Monday that never in his 85 years had the weather been so bad on his birthday. It is fair to say that he is sufferrring a few memory lapses these days.

"GP BW," I said last evening, "your wonder drugs have worked wonderfully!"

"Great!" he said, "I thought they would, once I'd actually persuaded you to try them."

"Erm... no," I replied, "I mean they worked wonderfully in reminding me that I could actually feel worse than I was before I took them. Aside from the two weeks of feeling like a space cadet, we do seem to be short of quite a few items of crockery and glassware that fell through my unfeeling fingers, and the stairs did suffer damage when I fell up them, and I suffered damage when I fell down them. However, on the positive side, turning pain into tingly numbness for a while enabled me to get back to swimming most days, which I haven't been able to do since about February."

He tried to give me a different kind of nasty pain modulation chemical. We had a bit of a discussion. I did a deal with him - if I could keep swimming most days (fortunately 'most' remained undefined), and so hopefully continue to improve my pain-frree mobility, he'd not keep suggesting different fantasy tablets. He did seem rather keen to know what I planned to do with the rest of the packet though... I resisted saying that they were going to be my rainy day fund as I'm sure the local kids would pay good money for them. Just at the moment, I'm not convinced that he would have taken the idea in the jokey sense I intended.

I did what I always do with part-taken blister packs. Cut neatly round the remaining tablets, rounding off the corners so they don't painfully stick into me, and put them somewhere safe. I do that with any kind of part-used tablet pack. It keeps them neat, and frees up space. Only a tiny amount of 'space' admittedly, but, it all mounts up. (Aside - grief, I nearly used the slogan of That Supermarket Chain Of Which We Do Not Speak on here. Spells really must be going awry!). Am I the only one?

Mr BW has gone off to The Alps for a couple of days. He went to kiss Mi1dred goodbye, and returned with this dictated missive from her for you all:

Morning dears!

Well, its been a while hasn’t it, but thought I would pop in for a cup of oil and a chat to tell you what I have been up to.

I have been on 2 outings since coming back to The Coven and I think BW and Mr BW are getting used to the ‘every journey is an adventure’ principle.

First time out was to the local meeting of my kind'sClub Night, where I met up with a friend who was a couple of years younger than me and whose gear stick broke off on the way. A pair of mole grips was produced and she drove home without any problems. I went home in the dark and rain and Mr BW was SCARED.

Then last weekend I took the BWs out for a drive to a pub. Unfortunately I had one of those embarrassing leaks. It was the first time I had my petrol tank filled for a while (and unfortunately, despite 5 gallons, my gauge remained on empty so another thing to fix I am afraid) and my muscles could not hold the volume, so when stopped on a slope outside the pub I started leaking around my nozzle. The BWs jumped back in and drove home……I cannot imagine why. Mr BW has patched me up and hopefully I am OK now. My window winder also jumped out of its slot so my window would not close, again fixed with a screwdriver and a bit of brute force.

On the way, I met one of my relatives on the road and we waved and parped to each other, we had such fun.

I must tell you about an exciting thing, I have had 2 boxes arrive for me this week with indicators and stop light bits and pieces to make me a bit safer on the roads.

Must go now, speak soon my loves.

Thought for the day

You are never given a dream without also being given the power to make it true. You may have to work for it, however.

- Richard Bach

Monday, Monday...

It's either a blog entry, or swimming to relieve the aches and pains returned after I had to discontinue the 'pain modulation medication' my GP finally persuaded me to try, against my better judgment, after 10 days of a 14 day trial (I hate pharmaceuticals, they heighen and interact with my Powers, and having to hold on to sofa cushions to stop myself floating up to the ceiling while conversing with Good Friend BW on Friday was the final straw), followed by tea and teacakes with Good Friend BW's Husband who is 85 today (he is a dozen or so years older than her).

Hmmmm.... in brief then,

1. Mi1dred was very naughty and took us out to lunch on Saturday, then had a tantrum outside the selected pub, necessitating a very rapid return home while we still could.

2. We've been very busy decluttering, tidying, and otherwise attempting to return order to the disorder that The Coven has become.

3. The garden is currently too productive. There is almost nothing that we don't have. The stripey familiars are drowning in sticky substance. The weather is not helping us.

Thought for the day

I live on Earth at present, and I don't know what I am, I know I am not a category. I am not a thing - a noun. I seem to be a verb, an evolutionary process - an integral function of the universe.

- Buckminster Fuller

If there were 26 hours in a day, I could spend the last 2 of them blogging...

The danger of coming back from a few days away in the middle of the summer, which we have rarely done before, is that the weeds will have taken over, the beans will have grown to two foot long and need detaching from their plants before they stop producing, and, depsite the rain, everything will need watering, and the damage done by the Naughty Fat D'Oves to the bean supports will need sorting out, which takes up half the evening. At least some tomatoes are finally ripe now. We can now have a complete home-grown salad again!

The danger of going away without tidying up one's Inner Coven, and leaving one's marbling and other recent projects all over The Studio floor is that when one gets back, one has to spend the rest of the evening that one hasn't spent doing Familiar and Garden things, tidying up in preparation for Temporary Cleaner BW's first-visit-in-two-weeks, tomorrow, rather than recounting the events of one's interesting mini-break to one's blaudience. Particularly since Mr BW has gone to a Mi1dred Meeting. In the rain. With the list of twenty zillion questions for the other Owners of Mi1dred's Type that he compiled while we were away.

So, just time to say that, worryingly, we liked the chuffa train best (aside - a question that has been puzzling me recently - why are train spotters called anoraks and other obsessives called geeks?), and it was lovely to meet and spend the afternoon with the very hospitable Mr and Mrs Razorblade yesterday, and I want their gorgeous Tudor chimneys. And a few other things from their wonderful country estate, but I mustn't be greedy :)

More anon (where anon = a future time, of unspecified distance in the future, because, judging by the calendar, there aren't many spare minutes in the next few days...)

Frustration is...

Last Post

This might be the last post until Thursday, if Mr BW's new gadget fails to do its stuff. Otherwise there might be updates.

Being a Cruel Witch, now that Mr BW has Mi1dred back at The Coven (complete with newly rebuilt engine), I am making him go away for a few days' break. Not too far as I'm currently not up to more than an hour of so of travelling. But, those of you living north-north-east of here had better watch out for low flying brooms, they're coming to inspect your turnips and to see what else is Normal For There :)

And where did I recently find all these postboxes on a Nice Ladies' outing?

For anyone of a Crafty Texti1e Persuasion, I have just been directed to an excellent website: http://www.fibrecrafts.com/.

Oh.. and... it being Saturday, those Readers of Long Standing had better sit down will remember that, Back In The Day, I used to reward those who had made me laugh in the week with a Trophy and some sweet BW Points.

I don't laugh so much these days, but I did laugh at drD this week. He seems to be on some good stuff of late (mind you, I've got some of my own now, but that's another story for another day). He's doing a little series entitled 'Cliches of Modern Life" and No 2: 'Work hard and play hard', contained this:

During the 1980s a lot of British people pretended to be American. At least they thought they were being American but this was in the days before you could fly to New York for 25p return or get three months at DementiaWorld, Florida and still have change out of a £35.50 M&S gift voucher (no air miles allowed if you are not buying a drink with your sandwich ).

All most people had to go on, in order to learn their American ways, was Dallas and Dynasty. This is what people used to do to amuse themselves before there was the possibility of sending photos of your privates to strangers on the internet.

And it goes on. Read more.

I nearly gave drD more points for his comment under the first Friday Question, but then I thought better of it. One Trophy and 2 points is quite enough :)

Friday questions

Ooooo, they would have been earlier, but some paper jammed and then ripped off in the printer, which I had to take apart to fix, so then I didn't have time before I had to do something else. Why *do* printers or photocopiers jam when you are trying to copy or print something at the last minute?

Now, onto the real Friday questions.

What is it?

What is it?

What is it?

Thought for the day

He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.

- George Herbert

Invisibility

Oh dear. My spells to make more time so that I can do all the research we need before we nip off for a few days break have gone wrong. I was looking for more time so that I could plan an itinerary from internet info. Instead, the Powers That Be decided we needed to take the internet with us. So they caused Mr BW's employer to provide him with one of these. The functionality of a laptop in a phone. Apparently much more advanced than the Blackberry he previously had that refused to talk to the hands-free system in the car, so had to go back.

It weighs about as much as a brick (well, half a brick) and so, if you attach it to your belt with the supplied belt clip it pulls your trousers down. That is a Good Thing as I'm forever telling Mr BW not to do that as it is too 'Workman', and the long-term effects of so doing won't be known for another 20 years, by which time it will be too late for anything but chemotherapy.

Its price (up to £299) reminds me of my first Sony mars bar phone back in March 1993 (the one with the pop-up earpiece and pull out aerial). That was £299, plus £75 connection, plus £17.50 a month, plus 35p per minute for each and every call. That was the best phone I've ever had, because it met all my needs: to make and receive a few calls. And look, I was once at the cutting edge of technology! And I can't believe that 1993 was only 14 years ago. It seems like yesterday.

Oh yes, talking of dates... it's 12 years today since we moved into The Coven!

Anyway, not understanding such hi-tech as Mr BW's new gadget, and wanting to know how invisibly I can use it, I have a question for the technical amongst you.

The phone is permanently on, so it receives email all the time. It also auto-syncs once a minute with Mr BW's main work server so that sent and received email, and documents worked on, magically arrive on his work PC, in the right files. Scary. Even *I* can't do magic like that ;)

So - my question - if one uses the internet capability for the phone, is that too going through Mr BW's work server, or does it go straight to the [operating satellite/whatever gubbins magically powers it] and back?

The underlying question is, of course, if one uses the phone to, erm, post to one's blog, can one be seen/monitored by the IT bods at one's place of work?

I'm not paranoid... The Surveillance Society is everywhere. Ignore it at your peril. Don't put info into the public domain that you don't want to be linked up eventually. Oh, and read this. Just because you don't have a loyalty card doesn't mean that that a shop isn't logging your every purchase. You use the same credit card every time you shop, don't you?

Presents and Presence

Packages keep arriving at The Coven.

I am jealous.

None of them are for me.

They are all for either Mi1dred or for Mr BW.

Mi1dred's are huge thick body covers (protection against The Feline Familiars with whom she will have to share a home - oh, and, on that subject, there may be very weeny kitten pics again in the next few weeks Debster), books, more books, even more books, spare parts (I don't ever wear tights so she's had to acquire a new fanbelt, just in case) etc etc.

In the last week Mr BW has had 2 pieces of cake made by a 10 year old girl who invited me to tea and had written, "BW is cool!" in chalk on the pavement as a welcome (that is the last word I would ever use to describe myself, but, heyho), rock from Edward (well, I think it was Edward as it had teeth marks in it almost before it came out of the packet), a box of chocs that Good Friend BW won in a raffle but couldn't eat (she said, "I looked at the chocolates, sighed, thought too many calories, and immediately thought of Mr BW" - yes, Cat, your comment yesterday was sadly only too accurate!), and two original books on Mi1dred's Make, again from Good Friend BW (they were her first husband's father's, and he had a Mi1dred from new).

My friends are all giving Mr BW presents, but there are none for me. I am wondering why.

On the subject of Mi1dred (who should be back at The Coven in the next day or so having had her engine rebuilt by the previous owner - at present we only have her registration document, on which DVLA have insisted she has 858 BHP rather than 747, as they apparently do with all of her kind; I'm writing to ask them for the missing 111), Mr BW supplies this update:

Mr BW goes to local car spares shop to help support local shopkeepers:

Mr BW: Do you have any SAE 30 and SAE140 oil please?
Shopkeeper: Do you mean 10:30 oil?
Mr BW: No, mean SAE 30
Shopkeeper: Here John do we have any (looks at Mr BW)...
Mr BW: SAE 30 oil
Shopkeeper 2: Never heard of it, is that for a lawnmower?
Mr BW: No its for....oh never mind

Close your ears Mildred, we know you aren't a lawnmower!

So, Mr BW and Mi1dred have presents. Lots of presents. It's not fair. I want presents. I need presents. What would you send?

Mind you, it could be a waste of time sending me presents, because on my calendar for today it says, "Dying". Yesterday I made cords and braids. Also yesterday it was pointed out to me that I'd mis-spelt my name on an official form. Oh dear...

Competition, cushions and competition

The current incessant droning of combine harvesters night and day is driving me quite mad.
I can't even fly on me broomstick at sunset in peace.
I have competition.
Spot the competition
(Hint: cf sidebar pic)

I'm busy being a Crafty Witch and making things like this fe1ted and embroidered cushion, inspired by flowers seen in a NT garden. The camera's nearly dead so the close-ups are too blurry to post which is a pity.

Excellent post from Harriet on blogging today here with which I 110% agree; do go and read it.

Buzzy busy

Post boxes, painting, putting up handrails, making cushions, decluttering the garage to fit Mi1dred in, going to a fuchsia show, harvesting lots of fruit and veg, making lots of jam, enjoying 3 days of summer at last.

Far too busy to write any more. Talk amongst yourselves...

Sunday question

The owners of a large local property with a stable and a horse used to put out bags of manure by the gate about once a week, but not at consistent times, with a big notice, "Please help yourself!" Our rhubarb and veggie beds benefited enormously.

Passing by yesterday, I remarked that they hadn't put any out for ages, and suggested a reason. Mr BW said that only I would come up with that as a reason.

So, let's see... what is your most logical reason for this?

Friday question

Scenario 1: A fish and chip shop (with only one branch) in Local Small Town is employing people from outside the EU who are here on tourist visas (so not allowed to work) to do preparation and washing up behind the scenes. The people are being made to work 12 hour shifts, with just one 20-30 minute break. No food while on duty is supplied, and they are being paid just £2 per hour cash. Being invisible workers, if they had an accident (not hard with sharp knives, chip cutting machines and hot fat around) there would be no insurance and no legal come-back for them. They have been told that if anyone official comes in, the person serving will call out to them for more cut potatoes, using a name that is not theirs, and they have to quickly disappear out of the back door and not come back that day.

What would you do?

Scenario 2: A burger bar (huge global company) in Local Small Town is employing illegal immigrants and people from outside the EU here on tourist visas, who can appear 'legal' because they are using the NI numbers of people who are currently out of the country. No other confirmation of personal details is being required before they are employed, provided they have an NI card that matches the name they give. They are being paid minimum wage and given appropriate breaks and meals on duty. The Manager is aware of what is going on, and calls the people involved by their real first names.

What would you do?

Both these scenarios are going on right now in Local Small Town (and probably in every town in the UK).

Thought for the day

Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not.

- Oprah Winfrey

Thought for the day

Happiness is the soul's joy in the possession of the intangible.

- William Jordan